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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenage Boys

42 replies

Everyonesbuck · 16/05/2020 15:25

Anyone else blessed with teen boys like mine!!

Some Interesting Facts about #lockdown Teenage Boys

  1. Teenage boys are nocturnal, meaning they come out at night. Most of their day is spent sleeping in a room without fresh air and daylight.
  1. If you find them out during the day, dazed and wandering, don’t panic they’ll be in search of food.
  1. Upon waking, they emit very loud sounds as if trying to raise the dead, signalling to their Mother they are awake and hungry.
  1. The metabolism of a teenage boy is enviable; they can eat their body weight in food within a matter of minutes without so much as gaining an ounce - hungry again in less than an hour.
  1. Will relentlessly forage for food late evening through to early morning.
  1. Teenage boys tend to prey on younger brothers when bored or hungry.
  1. Teenage boys are not keen on communicating during the hours of ‘civilisation’. They are more commonly known to wait until everyone is asleep before slamming doors and making loud noises, in turn waking everyone up and seizing the moment to recite the weird dream they had.
  1. When teenage boys invade the kitchen, they make an almighty mess, eating their sibling’s food and leaving empty boxes in cupboards masquerading as food.
  1. Regardless of ‘house rules’ teenage boys tend to be immune to them.
  1. They use electric light at night to find food, consequently, they have a habit of leaving the lights on as they retreat to their bedrooms.

  2. Teenage boys are farsighted meaning they can’t see things close to their eyes i.e. wet towels on floor or the 'missing' mugs, plates and glasses they allegedly don’t have collecting in their bedroom!

  3. Clear vocal speech generally not used. See facial expressions for clue ie. frowning, eyes skyward otherwise seek the help of another teenager for translation.

OP posts:
PJsEveryday · 18/05/2020 14:49

Mine just quite so nocturnal as he isnt allowed any devices in his room, but spot on with everything else. Hes my only child and I had no idea that he would suddenly consume a million calories a day. And his lack of good hygiene is driving me crazy. He feet reek.

I'm actually pretty pleased to know this is all quite normal really Smile

Oliversmumsarmy · 18/05/2020 14:51

17 year old Ds is exactly like this. 4pm-4am

Calls me into his room when he gets up and first thing he says is I’m hungry I need food.

He knows where the fridge is so I let him get on with it.

He does mow the lawn, keep his room clean and a few bits of diy from day to day.

Atm his jobs have stopped. Going to be a shock to the system when he gets back into it

Goneback2school · 18/05/2020 14:59

Mine is almost 15 and you could have been writing about him except instead of tiktok he would be regaling (boring) me with thspecs of the gaming computer he wants to get. However this morning there was an anomaly as yet unexplained whereby he was up before the small kids- about 7am and didnt make himself a cup of coffee because he didnt want the kettle to wake anyone!

Windyatthebeach · 18/05/2020 16:40

Ds 16 has just got up
..
Shock

Chocolatear · 18/05/2020 16:47

Mine is the same as the OP's teens. He is 17. The only difference is that today he has gone to see the girlfriend, social distancing is being observed.
The house now reeks of "man smell" as he has finally showered.

karenmiriam · 01/06/2020 15:05

Hello fellow mumsnet users.
Same here, i never get to see my son during the daytime as his schedule is 12 hours behind ours. Lol! Getting woken up at 3am to the sound of his nauseating rnb music (i think they call it) which sounds like a total racket! blasting through the house whilst he's making his disgusting unhealthy pot noodle lunch. 2 months and counting, I don't give a fig about it anymore as i won't be able to deal with the lazy quaranteen (pardon the pun) coming to interrupt me and my evening glass of wine - or maybe bottle. Lol! GrinGrin

DustyMaiden · 01/06/2020 15:13

Mine is the rarest of breeds. Nocturnal yes. Only eats when hungry. Eats the same meal every day. Asked if I would consider putting diesel in my car occasionally to justify this.
Sends me pictures of cats. Doesn’t make any mess. Is amazingly intelligent and funny.

Goldenrain · 05/06/2020 18:11

My DD who is 13 is voluntarily up in the morning latest by 7.30am. She is orgaised, but goes moody sometimes. Particulary mutes herself in the early morning as she settles for her school work. Highly energetic.
My DS who is 16 wakes up late.It takes loads of our energy to wake him up. Equally difficult to get him to bed before midnight.Lazy and moody but loving and helpful, does the chores when asked to. Trying to manage addiction to screens.

OhioOhioOhio · 05/06/2020 18:14

Meeeh

How do you stop the nocturnal nonsense?

lljkk · 05/06/2020 22:44

turn off the wifi

Octopus37 · 06/06/2020 08:01

This is my oldest DS to a tee, he turned 13 last week, especially the room, food, goading brother, leaving stuff everywhere, eating us out of house and home and goading his younger brother aspects. He is now taller and heavier than me which is scary, will have a 6 footer before I know it.

Pipandmum · 06/06/2020 08:11

I guess I have a rare one then. 16. Generally up between 7-8am. Cooks his own meals, irons his own clothes, makes his bed, does the washing up (the last two fairly new characteristics). He doesn't stop talking - and will talk to anyone. He showers every day and likes to look clean and smart. Cannot eat too much as sluggish metabolism so has a strict food and exercise regime (but can clean out the fridge if so inclined).
Plenty of flaws - but he has the basics of a self sufficient, articulate human being.

ExpletiveDelighted · 06/06/2020 08:37

Ours is similar Pip, always up by 7, cooks family meals, washes up without being asked, talks, but he does forage for snacks.

Whoopsmahoot · 06/06/2020 08:47

We call mine a vampire as he only comes out after dark

LostaraYil · 06/06/2020 09:00

My DS 14 has a nap at night and his main sleep during the day. We tend to have a good chat and a nag about schoolwork at around 6am when we're both awake! I make him take the dogs out at least every other day after dinner to get him out of the house. DS 18 is better because he has been working and he likes to get a workout in most days and walk to the beach with friends occasionally. Both have fairly tidy rooms, though, at least by my standards...

monkeyonthetable · 06/06/2020 09:06

One of mine is a prime example of your species. The other is an early bird and tends towards chubby. he is incredibly careful about what he eats and I see him looking longingly at his beanpole brother scoffing down cheese toasties and ice cream between meals. I wish he had DH's genes not mine. Sad

FunnysInLaJardin · 07/06/2020 11:22

So glad to see other teens are nocturnal! My DS1 was up at 3am making toast and cereal and seems to sleep from about 4am to 1pm during the weekend. Was a bit worried tbh but I think it is probably quite normal for him.

Tbh I was very much like this as a teen. I once missed a whole day of school and my dad woke me at 4pm when he got home from work.....

DS2 is 10 and is asleep by 11pm and up by 8.30 am so hopefully more like his dad!

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