DD Age 15, nearly 16 very protective over phone, always keeps it locked and spends all her time on it in her room. We have huge daily battles to try to get her downstairs, she simply doesn't want to be around family and rarely opens up to us about anything.
She was bullied at school on a grand scale a couple of years ago. I reported it to the school and for a while School became intolerable for her as "The ringleader" was a very strong, fearless influential character with a huge "following" DD never forgave me for "making things worse for her at school"
DD is a quiet girl, pretty and intelligent. I'm delighted she's made a few friends at a club outside of school albeit that in the main they are boys. She spends most of her time in her room talking to 1 boy - they meet up (used to before lockdown) usually at our home maybe once a week or fortnight.
Phones always been used as a "tool" If she's rude or backchats (often does, she seems full of anger) then the phone gets taken away for a day. I found her old iPhone and decided to sell it and couldn't believe she gave me the access code so I could try to "transfer the stored stuff onto the laptop" I viewed the photos and am distraught.
There's pictures of a chat to "? Some random" on YOLO seems there was 4 girls stating what they were going to do to this "random", Other 3's friends post were silly girlie stuff, my DD's talked about the Big "c@ck" and what she was going to do with it and made reference to her P.... and C... Then Theres lots of pictures from other times of her posing provocatively with the tongue out and Cleave being pushed in an up with her "boyfriend" behind her kissing the neck. Another picture of her with a huge bite on her neck. There's also a picture of her in the mirror pulling her top up (revealing bra) And another one in boyfriends arms smoking ( I do not believe she is smoking and this this was prob a 1 off - boyfriend does smoke)
I'm worried for her that she's giving out the wrong impression and the use of swear and vulgar language seems to flow so very natural when she's on social media. I'm guessing if I had access to her conversations and threads then I would be even more horrified, I don't only a few where she's taken a photo of the thread. Husband wants me to get her down now and have it out with her and take the phone of her indefinitely!!!
I don't know where to go with it all. Is this normal talk for girls this age. She will be furious I have looked at her pictures (and I get that) I don't want to push her further away and feel that speaking about it certainly will however I can't let her think this is the right way to be presenting herself on social media ?
Would you let her know what you've seen ??