Vile teenage behaviour

[Sazzle34]

I cant cope with my nearly 15 year olds behaviour, she is currently grounded for lying to us in the Feb half term holiday saying she was going shopping with her friend only to go and meet a boy. I dont mind that she was going to meet a boy its the lying, then last night cos i wouldnt let her go out she told me to fuck off and that she hates me and doesnt want anything to do with me and cant wait to leave home so she doesnt have to see us ever again!! she is driving me to a nervous breakdown. Her mouth is vile

Op 💐 my DD is 15 but young and immature for her age she’s not interested in her appearance, being popular or boys but lies about other things like not having eaten all the chocolate biscuits, not having thrown a wrapper behind the sofa, what she has eaten and saying she has tidied her room/cleaned her teeth or made her bed when she clearly hasn’t. Also has a lot of anger mainly directed towards me (DH is who is rarely in and more laid back than me almost gets off Scot free) I also get the foul language and nasty comments. See the poem on another thread in the teenage section about holding on to the rope read and reread it. Take care 💐

I think this is pretty common in teens unfortunately! It is awful behaviour though and I wouldn’t let her away with talking to me like that, the teenage years are tough op I have sympathy for you!

Why did she lie? That would be my question.

I'm impressed that you didn't reply that you also couldn't wait for her to leave home - what revolting behaviour. And no it is not teenage standard, the bar is low on MN. She is being disgusting and in a less enlightened age would have got a well deserved thump.

if you can catch her calm, perhaps try to explain how horrible it makes you feel when she speaks to you like this. If she isn't inherently nasty there may be a small chance of getting through to her better nature.

otherwise the worse it gets the less she gets. Only shelter, food and education are essential. All else are privileges that have to be earned.

I feel for you because I have a daughter who did the same thing. She lies about everything and I mean everything. If I give an inch she takes a mile. I feel she is in self destruct mode. Two years ago top of the girl, good girl and a pleasure to be around. She's pretty and popular with the boys. This has attracted the wrong type of friends who are jealous and vile. She says she can't change friendship groups now as it's impossible to infiltrate another group.
She swears at us and tells us she hates us. She won't do ANY school work and I see her slipping lower and lower. I feel she's deeply unhappy but refuses to do anything to change or help herself. She very immature and just thinks we are ruining her life.
We are fully supporting her especially with school work but not interested. All her friends don't care about school or grades. It's this sort of vicious circle she can't climb out of. Social media is the devil. We take her phone off her every night but it's always a drama - like a toddler tantrum every day.
I'm actually worried about her mental health and if we are too harsh she will do something stupid. She doesn't understand the consequences of her actions.
Much sympathy because I can relate to the stress and unhappiness it brings. Our family feels fractured.