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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

At wits end teens & tweens

15 replies

legogal1 · 04/01/2020 23:11

Hi avid reader first time poster at my wit's end with a 13 year old who is cheeky and insulting unless he wants something temper is unreal nasty to older brother who is quiet and has a great nature been on my own with them for a while as they don't want to go out the house much & dh constant nightshift anyone else feeling fed up instead of festive

OP posts:
BillHadersNewWife · 05/01/2020 03:28

Well they're both teens aren't they...there's no tween in the mix! Teens are a nightmare I know...especially if one is decent and the other's a bit naughty.

I would come down hard on the 13 year old every single time he's mean to his older brother. Immediate removal of phone or games or whatever he loves.

bettybattenburg · 05/01/2020 03:43

I'd keep out of it unless it's really appalling or becomes physical, they have to learn how to resolve arguments. About the limit of my involvement would be to send the pair of them to one of their bedrooms to sort it out and then come down and tell you how they've resolved it.

BillHadersNewWife · 05/01/2020 04:10

betty I think OP's indicating the younger brother is bullying the older one. That's not something to keep out of.

bettybattenburg · 05/01/2020 04:20

That's why I said 'unless it's really appalling'

BrokenLogs · 05/01/2020 04:26

She says ds13 is nasty to older brother, who's the tween?

BillHadersNewWife · 05/01/2020 04:57

Betty this is quite clear I think... temper is unreal nasty to older brother

Unreal nasty sounds pretty bad.

JiltedJohnsJulie · 05/01/2020 10:00

What sort of things is the 13 yo doing OP?

BrokenWing · 05/01/2020 10:38

Betty you expect a quiet teen to deal with 'unreal nasty', that even the parent struggles to manage, from a 13 year old. The op had clearly explained this isn't teens bickering, it is one way.

OP, you need firm boundaries and consistent consequences. What do you do when the 13 year old is cheeky and insulting?

Original poster
legogal1 · 06/01/2020 10:18

Hi sorry he is not a tween his birthday was recently so my mistake just looking for some advice on this as I have taken the phone and x box away it has been away for a week now but still the cheek continues also 13yr old is afraid to sleep in his room on his own a he his scared of the dark so I have bee sleeping in his room on a camp bed for a few weeks now but I am going to move his bed into older son's so they are in the same room they will just have to get used to it not sure what else to do any ideas thanks can hi 😏😡

OP posts:
BillHadersNewWife · 06/01/2020 12:19

What!?? Don't move the troublesome son in with the good one! If the 13 year old is afraid of the dark then get him a nightlight. And let him listen to audiobooks at bedtime. don't inflict him on your older son who gets bullied by him already!

Original poster
legogal1 · 06/01/2020 12:40

Thanks have tried night light but will stay awake most of the night

OP posts:
BillHadersNewWife · 06/01/2020 12:43

Well then see the doctor with him. He may be a good candidate for Melatonin. That will help him...dont make your older son share with him!

Teaandcrisps · 06/01/2020 12:46

Whaaaaat? Why are they going to have to share?

Whatnowagnes · 06/01/2020 12:50

Don't move them in together. That's unfair on the older one.

Original poster
legogal1 · 06/01/2020 13:31

Yes I agree thanks I don't think it would be a good idea to move them together after all probably just more stress for all will find out about melatonin and will try the audio books again 🙄

OP posts:
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