What do you expect your kids to do when home from Uni?

[chocolatesaltyballs22]

Stepson (18) is due home for the holidays in a week. Before going off to uni he stayed with us 3 nights a week and we did everything for him - he literally didn't lift a finger. Now that he's been independent for a few months I feel like I'm going to expect more from him but I think he'll just sink back to his old ways and will expect me and his dad to do everything.

Also we moved youngest into his room so he will have to sleep in the box room when he's back. He's a big lad and I feel like he's not going to be happy about this (even though we did tell him that's what was happening).

Just feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing as I have to admit that there's been a lot less to do while he's been away and I'd like to be able to have a bit of a rest over Christmas.

I'm starting to feel really sorry for step mums on MN. They ask a perfectly reasonable question and then get criticised for something completely unrelated, line swapping bedrooms, which is a totally sensible thing to do!
OP, I think you need to talk properly to your dh because nothing will work if you don't come at it from a position of unity.
My ds puts the bins out for me, he will change his bedding, occasionally wash up if I tell him too, not voluntarily. He makes himself some meals. Mostly though, I cook and do the laundry etc

My DS will return at the weekend. He has a job over the Xmas period, so will be busy.

He will help out with general jobs around the house and cook the odd simple meal.

He will bring back washing and will sort that himself (with some help from me).

I'll also expect him to want/need some down time. The first term at uni is difficult and tiring. So I fully expect him to spend the majority of his spare time with friends or sleeping!!

I take that as a no then?

I see you don't escape the bitter exes even if you don't post in step-parenting....

I will expect mine to cook once or twice a week, load dishwasher, hang out washing sometimes. He will have plenty of studying to do too, so not much else.