17 year old wants to try alcohol

[Inniu]

DD is 17 and quite sensible.

She is going to a function in a few weeks and wants to have a drink with her friends before she goes.

I would prefer she didn’t especially going out to a function but I am not going to try to stop her.

She is clueless about alcohol though and I don’t want her trying something too strong.

What is a fairly light alcoholic drink for a 17 year old?

I think I drank West Coast Cooler at 18 or 19. Would teens today drink something similar or is that an old person drink?

There’s a rose fruit wine from Echo Falls which my DD and her teenage girlfriends seem to favour (as a replacement to vodka mixer depending on the occasion).
She might be OK with that one?
Just tell her she doesn’t have to drink anything if she doesn’t like the taste or how it makes her feel but don’t ban drinking. You can’t do anymore that that and you already talk to her about dangers of drinking.
It’s really nice to see she is so open to you about it.

DS(15) is going to a 16th birthday party/sleepover and the mother of the birthday boy asked whether I'm ok with non alcoholic beer being on offer to my son. She's also a teacher at another secondary school. Both of us are under no illusion that some 15/16 yr olds are accessing alcohol. Don't you remember being that age?

I would prefer she didn’t drink but I would also prefer to buy her something light, but not too easy to drink a lot of, than have her sharing vodka or some other spirit that one of her friends gets somewhere.

Cricketmum84 "Personally I would facilitate it and let her have a drink with you rather than a friend turning up with a bottle of vodka..."

In case you were referencing my post immediately prior to yours where I recommended Smirnoff ice - this is a very weak mixer of vodka blended with lemonade, and there are only 3 alcohol units per large wine bottle sized 700 cl bottle (which is rather different to the equivalent volume of neat Smirnoff vodka which would be 26 units)

Irish in the UK here, my DS is 18, last year or two, I started putting beer in the outside fridge and he can have one if he asks.

In the early days he would ask for a beer, drink half of it and leave the rest, now he will ask and have one or two once or twice a week.

He is the only one of his friends that hasn't been removed from parties for being absolutely mortal drunk, and generally is the one who looks after the ones who are proper drunk, whilst enjoying a few beers or vodkas at the party.

Please don't demonise alcohol the way it was in the day of the Pioneer movement, it only produced a generation of binge drinkers and alcoholics.

We have had a lot on lately (my health) and we needed to reconnect so we took a cab to a trendy pub in town and then a proper old fashioned pub for steak night, considering he was told to knock himself out, he was moderate in his drinking, we will ignore the cocktail he had in the trendy pub, because we were paying.

I'd be a little concerned if the night out was the first time she had any alcohol, that she would misjudge and be very ill.

White wine spritzer would be my suggestion, and stay away from the spirits, hone measures are so often large. Having said that the exception is pimms, which is fairly weak, and quite the novelty if mixed with mint, strawberry and cucumber (and lemonade obviously).

Um, or perhaps you're not in the UK and don't know about pimms...? I say that as I have no idea what a west coast cooler is

I was allowed a mixer and spirit right from when I was a little 'un. I also had wine at special events. I was allowed to try beer when I asked (I would have been about 12). The only habit I developed was for expensive single-malt and top-shelf wine. It seemed to be more accepted in the 60s, 70s and 80s (?).

I'd suggest a glass of 'Champagne' (or Prosecco) before she goes. It seems fitting.

My goddaughter would regularly have a glass of wine with us from about 14 on. Her brother would have a small malt whisky or a bottle of beer.

They grew up not getting drunk, but sadly ended up appreciating good things. The boy will only drink real ale and malt whisky, the girl is a bit more eclectic but has a liking for champagne and oysters.

The boy will only drink real ale and malt whisky, the girl is a bit more eclectic but has a liking for champagne and oysters.

Can I adopt them please?

Ds17 quite likes the odd alcopop / fruity cider (also vodka and coke, but I don’t think that’s what op’s after!) You can also get little tins of mixed drinks (I like some of the flavoured gin ones) that are only a unit or so each (better than home measures of spirits).
When I was that age I liked the odd bottle of lambrini cheap and fizzy but not too boozy!

Fruit cider tends to be popular first drink.

DS was similar having not drunk alcohol through secondary school (very sporty) but then announced his intention to get wasted at prom party.

I encouraged him to try the odd lager and cider a couple of weeks before as I didn't want him going OTT on his first night drinking. I'm really not sure whether I did the right thing or not, did I encourage him into drinking alcohol as I think he drinks too much now . (He's 18, but then, I drank a lot at 18 as well)

Daddy long legs agree with teenagers not being able to buy alcohol like we used to. Until DS and his friends were 18 they couldn't get served in pubs and parents bought alcohol for parties /sleepovers . You could say we were encouraging but at least as parents we would buy lower alcohol beer / cider etc

They all drink at 17 - unless they don’t want to of course - but as a parent you don’t have much control over what they do once they start going to parties other than telling them to be sensible.
Fruit cider, Smirnoff ice, vodka which is well diluted w mixers is what they tend to drink.
Even my 15 yr old DS has drunk alcohol - not regularly - but he’s told me he’s had beer and vodka on occasion and So far he’s been sensible (neither of mine are big party goers either but a lot of kids from 15 onwards get pissed every weekend - am not saying it’s right but it’s common).

Apologies if this sounds snobby but I really would not go the fruit cider. In my view, it is disgusting stuff, but more importantly, it is what teens get drunk on. It's sweet and easily drunk. I'd honestly suggest something a little more refined to give the impression that alcohol is for drinking not bingeing.

I like fruit cider! I must be an unrefined person then

Each to their own :) But it is known as a drink that teens get drunk on because the sugar masks the alcohol and it is relatively cheap.

Get her Smirnoff ice, bacardi breezes, fruit ciders or beer. Something that's 4 or 5% not too alcoholic.

So my drinking when as such (albeit I started at 13/14 at beach parties) :

Lambrini
Smirnoff Ice/WKD blue
Archers
Malibu
Spirits (Spiced rum/vodka etc)

I think Lambrini is probably a bit useless as it's essentially Schloer so won't feel 'alcoholic' as such, so I would probably go with Alcopops. Or fruity cider like Kopperberg or Rekorderlig.

Am I the only one who can't go near Malibu because it smells like bad 70s suntan oil?

I would suggest a lager or dry cider (at about 4% alc) or wine spritzers or even gin and tonic in a can rather than fruit cider, Smirnoff ice etc. as I think it's much better to educate young drinkers to expect alcohol to taste like alcohol rather than a sweet easily drunk soft drink. As alcohol is a bit of an acquired taste, generally, it means teenagers are less likely to drink too much too quickly. It is much easier to overdo things if your drink tastes like pop.

My teenage sons (15 & 17) drink very little despite access to whatever they want at the weekend. They might have an occasional beer or single malt whisky. I am under no illusions that this will stop them occasionally drinking way too much when out with friends as they get older, but I hope that they will generally drink quality drinks in moderation.

If you drink at home OP maybe just let her have half a glass of wine with you at a meal, or a beer with a curry. So she gets the idea that it is just part of normal life. Rather than something terribly exciting.