Teenager (16) not going to school - help?

[chezza41]

My teenage son has been excluded previously and is now at a new school of his choosing. After starting well he refuses to go, says he doesn’t care and won’t say why. I’m convinced drugs are involved, anyone been through this and came out the other side?

Unfortunately I can't say I'm out the other side but I can totally sympathise with you. My 16 year old went to 3 different schools. First one left in year 9 through choice, second one he chose to be in but school asked him to leave through weed being found on him in school. Third one managed to keep him in despite his non-attendance - had the welfare officer round etc. Left school with one GCSE, he's bright enough but because of non-attendance and virtually no revision failed. Applied and got a place on an art course at college which started last week but so far hasn't shown up. I work and so can't keep an eye on him, I'm separated and have an older son but they don't get on. We moved to a new rental property in the summer and neighbours have complained about noise and him smoking to the agents so have to be careful I'm not going to be thrown out of my home now. Tried everything with him, talking, trying to understand, trying to get him interested in other things, he wants a moped, learning to drive etc. This week had second complaint from agents so banned his friends from visiting or any smoking around the house, had a row with him and now he's gone to stay at a friends for a few days and still not gone to college. Not sure what to try next. sorry not to be of more help but just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

Thankyou for replying, it’s the hardest time when you know you can’t step in, advise, or even be there to stop them falling. My son went in Tues and Weds all fine at his choice, telling me he wants to go back and get GCSEs so I sorted it all, today, refused and said he’s not going back. I know he’s doing all sorts of other drugs and he is in a bad place but I am too close to help 😢 I’m sure you feel the same as he is jeopardising your home by being so disrespectful. I keep being told they’ll come out of it, but when you live it, you really can’t see past it at all.