Parental exam pressure

[Frazzled732]

Hello, my DS is 15 and in last year of secondary school. He's always been really good and tried hard academically but since early summer he has gone all 'teenage' and lost total interest. He's not interested in studying and is coming back home with B's instead of his usual A's and shrugging saying he's happy with that. So frustrating as he's more than capable of getting great grades but his attitude isn't right. He just wants to hang with his friends, and play games. How can I stop him letting himself down without making him feel like he has to get A's for me to feel proud. If he was trying hard and getting B's there would be no issue.

This thread might help you: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/secondary/3682806-Any-advice-re-screen-time-fir-year-11s-and-how-to-keep-the-noses-of-lazy-but-bright-kids-to-the-grindstone-without-making-them-stressed-about-GCSEs-Edited-by-MNHQ-at-OPs-request

There is also: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/secondary/3626184-Starting-Yr11-Gcses-2020-Support-Thread-Edited-at-OPs-request

What does he want to do next? e.g. If he wants to do maths A level many places will expect/require him to have got at least an A/7 and an A*/8 for Further maths.

With DD1 I talked about not wanting any 'if onlys' on results day. We wanted her on results day knowing she had done her best whatever the results - no saying 'if only I had worked harder' etc.

Would good old fashioned bribery work? Carrot and stick?

no to bribery. carrots or sticks.
I think its awful - education is for its own sake.
A nice (unexpected) reward or treat at the end is lovely. but bribery ... adds to the stress and takes all the natural pleasure and achievement out of it surely ....

But Plinney some teens aren't mature enough to see the work put in now will have rewards next August (or later in life).

I absolutely do not mean things like 350 for every A/7 grade.

I mean things like - do 30 mins work every evening and at the weekend you can have Xbox for 5hrs on Saturday evening.
Alternatively, no Xbox any evening until you have done all homework to acceptable standard.

350 => £50

Many thanks all - especially for the links above, the year 11 support forum is excellent!