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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Holidays with 15yo dd - your experience?

41 replies

theunrivalledjoysofparenting · 17/08/2019 23:26

Dd is 15. Went to France and Italy this year on hols - gorgeous villas with private pools.

Dd was v lackadaisical about what she wanted to do, about sight-seeing, beaches, our lovely pools, and preferred to spend a lot of time in her fricking room on her fricking phone.

Is this normal for this age??

But depressing. We have an 11yo ds who is super-enthusiastic about everything. Such a contrast.

Makes me feel like booking next year’s holiday depending on on what we want to do, not Dd...

Advice?

OP posts:

RJnomore1 · 19/08/2019 07:15

Just back from a week in Italy with a 15yo next month and no she wasn’t like that

But:

We booked a hotel as a villa is deathly boring, there was a shared pool to people watch, a bar for mocktails, some entertainment a couple of evenings, buffet breakfast choices

We tried to take things at her pace, lots of granita stops, get her involved as much in decisions as possible, spend time in crap shops we wouldn’t usually go in

Evenings after dinner if we were just sitting having a drink in the hotel we let her go up to the room if she wanted and chill out and do as she wanted in peace.

She’s also a pretty good natured engaged teenager, her sister at that age was a complete horror so perhaps it’s just personality 🤷🏻‍♀️

jeanne16 · 19/08/2019 07:40

After a disastrous holiday in a villa in Portugal with my 2 teenagers, we did Family adventure holidays with the company Explore, as mentioned by Backinthebox. They were fantastic. We went to interesting places, did fun things and there were other teenagers the same age. We made some new friends too. I can’t recommend them enough.

CherryPavlova · 19/08/2019 07:51

No ours were always pretty enthusiastic but they’d not done many foreign holidays -except Centre Parcs - until their teens - We chose holidays they would have more to do than villa with pool. Neilsons were brilliant for teenagers.

Original poster

theunrivalledjoysofparenting · 19/08/2019 13:07

Thanks for all the views!!

DD would not enjoy Center Parcs type holidays. She's too self-conscious and wouldn't like to talk to other dc. DS wouold, though...

She does like going away with friends, though. She's very different with them. Will look at the Family Adventure holidays.

I'm not keen on hotels and lots of other people, though. I love a villa and a good view, and privacy...

OP posts:

rookiemere · 19/08/2019 13:22

So this year we've done a balance of what DS 13 enjoys - shared holiday with SIL and family in Uk that he always enjoys, amazing trip to NZ where DH and DS did some adrenaline experiences whilst I did wine tasting, weekend to the Lake District with other family that he claimed to not enjoy and in the October break we're off to Tenerife. Not sure DS will get much out of Tenerife- it's a fly and flop trip albeit in a nice aparthotel, but we need the break and there are some aspects such as the water park that he will enjoy.

Unfortunately it's a natural part of growing up to dis-attach , I guess trick is finding something you all enjoy. Must confess I am most looking forward to a couple of nights sans DS walking in the lake district probably whilst DS on a rugby trip.

applepieicecream · 19/08/2019 17:08

I'm not keen on hotels and lots of other people, though. I love a villa and a good view, and privacy...

I think that’s your problem. I also like a villa and privacy but my kids want to climb the walls with that kind of holiday. I think you need to decide what your priority is, if it’s for DD to have a good time a private villa isn’t going to work. If it’s for her to enjoy it that might mean compromising a bit

JustDanceAddict · 19/08/2019 18:33

We have a 15 yr old and 17 yr old. The youngest is usually harder to please on holiday but he was actually ok this year. We had an iPad and he watched his Netflix series sitting on the beach (when not in sea) and was equally happy to sightsee as we didn’t trawl around museums or old buildings.
We all compromise a bit on what we’d ideally like to do so it works - sort of!

JustDanceAddict · 19/08/2019 18:40

I would climb the walls in a private villa, never mind teen DCs!!
DH is v keen we continue holidaying with DCs forever even if they have one with their friends, they can come with us after. I’m not sure about that unless it’s a short city break.

Cyclemad222 · 19/08/2019 18:46

I remember my last holiday with parents. I divided the remaining time into 6 hour blocks and counted them off. It was horrendous.

I was maybe 17 and would rather have been anywhere else.

Geraniumpink · 19/08/2019 20:06

We always do self catering, so quite private. We like to go out and see things - so mostly city breaks and places of interest and a bit of shopping/cake and tea place. Dd wasn’t thrilled by it all, but said she’s enjoyed it. In the evening it was all drawing and Netflix/internet for her and one night she cooked!

Sparklypen · 19/08/2019 20:23

Mine are around that age and city breaks have gone down well, whereas a few years back they hated looking round the sights of towns or cities . It's worth getting their input on what sort of thing they like.

Original poster

theunrivalledjoysofparenting · 20/08/2019 00:03

We did get their input on what they liked! This is my issue!

Dd said she’d be happy to go to the regions of France and Spain we booked - Spain good because of GCSE Spanish.

And like i’ve Already said, although I prefer villa holidays, so does dd! Booking a center parcs type holiday would have been no better. She’s doing history too and she said she’d enjoy the historical sites, but in the end not so much... that’s what’s so frustrating.

Off fir discussion on holidays for next year ... such fun!

OP posts:

HotChocolateLover · 22/08/2019 07:23

Yup, I find that DSD (15) is very similar to how you’ve described. DSD (9) loves getting involved. DS (16) is a combination of the 2 but between the ages of about 14-15 he was quite like DSD. 15 seems to be the prime ages for being a holiday pain!

LuluBellaBlue · 22/08/2019 07:27

I can’t imagine anything worse for a 15 yr old than a private villa for a chosen holiday type - do you really expect them to only socialise with you for the entire trip and be happy about that?
They’re teenagers and want to mix with their peers.

Seeline · 22/08/2019 08:00

My two are 15 and 17 and still enjoy the family holiday. We have done AI for the last 4/5 years which is great as they can eat what they want, when they want etc. Usually join us in the evening for dinner, but can get up late and have breakfast when they like. They love the pool, and even this year, whilst both had phones for music and games, they both read actual books as well!

We always hire a car for several days, and everyone gets a say in wherever go and what we see. We usually try the local buses too to explore the local towns which is always good fun.

Maybe my two are not typical, but at the moment they both appear very keen to join us again next year.

Gigia · 23/08/2019 14:04

Another one whose ds would hate this sort of holiday. We just went to LA which he loved and we were out every day sightseeing, shopping, boat trips, meals out etc. Also took my 16 year old dn for company for him and they had a great time. Other holidays have been city breaks and active holidays. TBH I hated family holidays as a teenager because my parents liked to sit around and relax.

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