What are your 13yr olds doing this Summer

[Hedgyhoggy]

Ds (13) is my eldest, there is also ds(10) with quite challenging SNs and dd (6), we also live in a rural quite isolated area. These factors make it quite tricky for him to independently access activities and family activities tend to focus around the other 2 dc. I take him occasionally to meet friends and my dh and I take it in turns to do something with him. He helps out at home, plays on Xbox, loves playing football but club is broken up for the Summer. He’ll take home self off for a bike ride. Friends are welcome but he doesn’t have many who he’d invite at the moment as he is moving schools in September and this has caused a few issues. What are your 13 year olds doing? Feel like he needs to be more productive

DS13 here. We have organized trips two or the days each week into London, local fairs, places of interest that he may or may not attend (although will come into London obvs). Otherwise, time is spent on the PC/Xbox/Netflix and every couple of days he will head into the local towns (two close together, so he either walks, catches a bus or train depending on how flush he is feeling!) with his GF/mates and they will hang about for hours doing whatever it is teens do in town! (mostly the boys are dragged into the shops by the girls then come home expressing amazement at how expensive Claires is!) He and DS2 also have a job feeding cats for a local to earn some money so they are quite responsible doing that and head out without prompting, so at least they are out every day!

DD1 (12) had 4 days of sports camp the first week of the holidays. Last week she did 2 days at local pool club (2 hours per day) and spent @ couple of days with best friend, today has gone to another friends to play, and they are swimming.

Next week she is helping at a drama club for reception to year 2 kids for 3 mornings. Another morning at pool club. Following week 2 days at pool club then we go away.

DS (15) has been at cadet camp this week and has nothing else planned until our holiday. Although he is minding DD2 (8) on Wednesday as I am working in Birmingham so will be out 6am until 8pm

Not much. She's been out once with a friend, and is talking about seeing another one next week. There are vague plans of a sleepover party at the end of the month. She's mostly been on her laptop or phone. I have offer her something really worthwhile to coax her out. I took her to see my mum today and we went to a pottery cafe this week. But as soon as we're home she's back on the computer. DH keeps going on about it, but I figure it's limited to the holidays, and I'm alright with it as long as she comes out at least 3 times a week. She talks to people on the phone I think. Just not actually seeing many of them. It's a bit of a weird age

Chilli, glad I'm not alone. Yes, I think the lack of actual contact thing is unhealthy whereas at school at least she is brought into contact with her friends (she has a small circle) and her brain is largely engaged. With 3 dcs of varying ages I miss the lack of routine - summonsing up the effort to organise activities that suit all 3 dcs is exhausting in itself. I've got it cracked with dc2 (nearly 6), holiday club is going down an absolute storm - she doesn't want to leave which must be a positive thing and she goes 3 days a week, so, so glad I arranged this. But dd1 just hanging around the place and leaving a trail of devastation behind her is not doing my patience any good (I'm extremely hormonal too at the moment, plus running around after toddler - not a good combination for my tolerance levels).

Some people really enjoy the time off with their children but all I feel is overwhelmed most of the time sadly, unless dh takes leave and we go out for the day and then things seem a lot better.

BurnedToast, yes, if we stay home it seems to be screens (with a bit of reading thrown in), all the way.

The biggest problem I'm finding is with my 11 year old and the 13 year old. He's desperate to do stuff with her but she's not interested. He set up a load of sweets and crisps and drinks for them both to watch a film and she's refused to get off her computer . It's so sad to him so upset. Would you force it or would you leave her to it?

Ah that’s sweet. I’d try to talk to her and get her to go along with it.

DD is 13, 12 year old DS with ASD and live rurally. Broke up on 24th, since then she's been out with friends in the village, to the youth club bus which comes once a week. She spent a few hours helping paint a room and has been playing with her rabbit.

She has just gone off to France on the Eurostar to spend a week with French relatives by herself and they are taking her out.

Once she's back we are off for 2 weeks on holiday to Sweden and Norway so she will walk an alpaca, canoe with beavers, kayak in sea, moose safari, white water rafting etc. Then it will be back to meeting up with friends in village and youth club bus.

My 13 year old goes to friends house, friendacome here, they go to town together, play football, go to the beach and Subway, and McDonalds! He still has his guitar lessons and Judo training through the holidays. He still enjoys family days out like a day we have planned to Bkackpool and we do local things too like go for lunch, to local festivals etc. We're away on holiday to a fantastic family resort soon where he always makes new friends.

So far: swimming at local leisure centre (only £1 off pick time), cycling in nearby parks, Brazilian Jujitsu (cheap membership for the summer holiday), making and recording music with friends, bowling, walking into town looking for school stuff, visiting local museums, feeding the squirrels and ducks with younger siblings of his friends in our local park, cutting the grass in the garden, washing the car, going to the cinema, sketching local landscapes, getting on the train and meeting friends for lunch and chat, visiting grand parents, cooking or baking independently. Picking fruits and vegetables at a local farm, reading for pleasure, revising a little bit, listening to music & relaxing in the garden, skateboarding etc.

My 13yo is seeing friends a fair bit and lolling around in his room on his phone or PS4 the rest of the time. He's been reasonably happy when away with us though and we're away quite a bit (nothing exotic - visiting family, uk beach hol and camping) so I'm pretty much leaving him to his own devices the rest of the time.
Ds10 is thoroughly enjoying having the run of the house, TV remote and my attention although gets a bit fed up that he can't see friends as much or as easily - most of his classmates have working parents and/or separated parents so are either at childcare or on 2 separate holidays and not around much.

My DD would live to see her friends but as pp said, they’re either on holiday or with the other parent , or staying with GPs as parents working. I work term time so at least she has me and older sister though she is working lots to save for uni . She must be bored as she volunteered to help me food shop yesterday!

We're having a fab time. DS 14 and DD12. I am letting them have a lot of screen time as long as they come out with me and the dog most days. DS is binge watching all the Dr Who's along with X Box and Youtube. He has had one sleepover and 2 cinema trips. DD is more sociable and has been swimming and had 2 sleepovers. Its hard fitting around everyones holidays but we're off at the end of the holidays and DS has Scout Camp this w end so don't mind the down time now.

Well, I will be relieved for my daughter when she does start back at school shortly. She has seen very little of her friends, though I believe they have faced-timed or whatever you call it but most of the time she has spent on her own/with her younger siblings and it doesn't seem healthy. She has had loads of screen time but other than that has little inclination to go anywhere although she has been out with me a few times and that was lovely but transporting three dcs including two young ones is difficult. It seems that dd is happy to meet up in a group but not with individual friends except one of them who has not really been around this hols.

Mine has not really bothered to meet up with her friends much despite me suggesting she could. Everyone seems to be busy doing family stuff including us. We've been camping a few times (one of the times took a friend for each child along) and she is performing in a musical at the end of the week so there's been rehearsals too. Otherwise going to the beach (we live near it) or vegging out at home.

We’re also by the sea, so dd and her brother have completed a PADI scuba diving course this summer. Thought she’d struggle with the theory tbh but she passed, so proud of them both, now looking for some nice warm water holidays so I never have to go near British waters

Wish we were by the sea. During our weeks holiday teenage dd loved swimming/body boarding in the sea or sitting on a rock reading a book much better than being at home. Plus both me and dh were around to give the children a bit of individual time.

My DS1 is 12.5 so not quite a teenager but I've really noticed this summer he doesn't want to do anything! Given the choice he would just stay at home all day on screens or reading / drawing, so I've compromised and he's had a couple of trips out each week and a couple of lazy days at home. He's met up with friends a couple of times but isn't that bothered generally. In terms of our days out him and his 10yo brother have started resisting going out 'just' for a walk but have enjoyed meeting friends at the beach, going to a museum, going to CEX to choose a load of 50p DVDS, and out for breakfast or lunch.