Missing the way things used to be. So badly

[RosaLappen]

Dd has always been an easy teenager and we've been very close, talking lots all the time.
She's had a boyfriend for a year. While she was doing exams they only saw each other once or twice a week so that was fine. But now exams are over they are constantly together and I never get to talk to dd without him there and I miss our chats so so much! I feel quite bereft tonight. I don't want to say anything because I don't want to guilt her into it, but oh boy I'm finding it hard...

Take a deep breath - this is the moment when you really start to let her go. I have had to do it three times over with my DDs. Definitely don't breathe a word! It will all come full circle and she will be ready to relate to you as one adult to another.

Parenthood is all about slowly letting go.

I can rationalise it but emotionally I'm a total wreck tonight. But I know I need to hang in there.

Can you take her out for a special mother daughter day at some point? Something just for the two of you? It's a bit odd not EVER to speak up her without the BF. Does he stay over at yours every night? Or does she go to his?

And if she's doing the same to her friends I'd be a bit concerned. It's not healthy to drop all your friends and family and never see them on your own. Means she'd be very cut off if things did go wrong in the relationship.

I agree. Yes at the moment they're together all the time. Unfortunately friendships have always been difficult for her so there weren't really any to lose.
I think she feels she has to make the most of this time with him now because for a year they were very restrained because of exams and now in September they're off to university. I don't want to interfere with that because I worry it will just have the opposite effect of her turning against me.

She probably doesn't realise. Don't make a fuss, just say to her "I've reserved Wednesday for us to go shopping together" or "I've booked us in at a spa" or "bought this dvd for a girly night Friday"

Sounds like you two have a lovely relationship and good on you for not "confronting her" as that would only make it worse x

There is another great thread with loads off advice link below
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/teenagers/3584550-Holding-on-to-the-end-of-the-rope-life-in-the-bunker-with-the-Po-Ts-where-parenting-a-teen-is-having-an-adverse-effect-on-our-mental-health

I feel the same
Mine moved to Canada
I love that she’s happy
But it’s not how I imagined it would be, going shopping, going for lunch on days off, just hanging out
I miss her but I would feel guilty if she knew how sad I am that’s she’s so far away

Similar here so I try to make sure we have a weeknight dinner out together so at least she doesn’t feel she can text when we are eating. At home she will often FaceTime him during dinner so they can eat together! Other than that it’s chats in the car to and from her boyfriends.

• so he can eat with us is what I meant as we almost always have dinner together but his family doesn’t!