Talking to a teenage boy who always ends up crying

[GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat]

He’s always been emotional but I have to admit I’m still surprised he cries so easily even at 15.

He’s a smart sensible boy who’s never really given us any trouble. But when we do have to speak to him, he cries very easily. It’s mostly school work that will provoke the biggest reaction. He’s just completed his mocks and some of the results aren’t what he would hope. He’s top set in everything and not really used to having to work at it. We’re trying to help him see that he does now (and he has been better at revision) but I also think he could have tried harder.

Every conversation though is so predictable! It’s getting really hard work. We’re sympathetic and trying to be helpful, speaking to him in a mature way, rather than telling him off like a child but it’s still so hard to have a proper conversation with him.

Any else been here and have any tips?

Good point, Gingerivy.

I wonder if a better strategy would try to give him more control, and without setting expectations he finds stressful. Convo Could go like this.

You "I see your results are XYZ." (pause) "Do you want to talk about them?"
Him: No!
You: "Problem is I have this postcard to fill in & send back to school. What do you think I should write down?"
Him: I don't want to think about it.
You: "Deadline to send this back is tomorrow."
Him: I still don't walk to talk about it!
You: "I guess I will write down that I will continue to support you in any way I can. Sound good?"
Him: Fine!

It's kind of a recurring topic on MN: how to coax the best out of them. Maybe it's ok for yours to cry easily & that's just part of his journey to becoming more resourceful.

I'm far from convinced that ANYONE at school ever reads those feedback cards.

@joystir59
That's a bit harsh. Perhaps he doesn't want to be left alone, he might want to talk it through. The op doesn't sound overbearing at all. My brother always cries to deflect attention from the situation if you ask me. He just can't deal with any stress but he's lazy too. He doesn't want to work to get the results, he just wants an easy life. He's 42 now and just the same. Cries his eyes out to me about mum being unwell but reluctant to actually help me with the nitty gritty of her care. He's a bit weak.
My dh cries at TV ads but he's very focused and strong minded so you know it's all in the personality.

Crying is a normal part of life, like laughing.

Thank you, some useful replies