Cancelled Florida

[Kmc1988]

My partner has cancelled our Disney world holiday because the way our 2 children have been behaving daughter 13 and son age 5 I don’t know if we’re being to harsh on them but they have no respect for us every day is a constant battle with them constantly fighting each other and weekly phone calls from school about are daughters behaviour nothing seems to be working with her I’ve removed all her gadgets e.g. phone iPad PlayStation and stopped her going out but she still continues to push us is taking away there holiday to harsh any advice or tips would be much appreciated

13 year olds can be very difficult but if you’re having issues with your 5 year old as well you need to look at changing how you’re parenting because it’s not working for you.

Also, you've made the family holiday conditional on a child's behavour(What if one had behaved and the other hadn't?) which is far too much pressure and more likely to make her think Stuff It and carry on anyway.

Do you have a family member she will go and stay with? Perhaps she needs a break from you all.

Internet and phone privileges are your weapon here. Not a family holiday.

The issue is why your daughter is acting out her anxiety and frustration?

Is your partner her father? What is their relationship like? Can you think of reasons that she is not happy?

The 5 year old is merely picking up the stress of his sister's behaviour.

Cancelling the holiday is not going to solve the problem.

You need to identify what is upsetting your daughter. Is it likely to be a school problem or issues at home?

She sounds very unhappy.

Holidays are a good chance to bond as a family and get onto a more positive relationship.

If you cancel the holiday, what positive relationship building experiences will you do?

Wow, I'm all for the 'no empty threats' etc but cancelling a holiday to Florida? I'm not sure that's going to improve your children's behaviour. Where's the 'let's all have a lovely time and see this as a fresh start?'

Inform think he was to harsh. Disney is expensive and it's his holiday as well.
Why would he want to put himself through the flights, heat and hell of Disney with two kids who can't follow a simple command?

*i don't

Well I don't blame him. Holidays with badly behaved teens can be awful. All this having a lovely time bonding etc doesn't always happen. In my experience you just end up with more rows, trying to keep a 5 year old and a 13yr old happy, and wondering why the hell you've spent so much bloody money on this, and swearing to yourself 'never again'.
Mines are 16 and 6 and a bit better now, but manys the time over the years I've been seriously reluctant to spend that much money on a family holiday, to go and have it ruined by crappy behaviour.
You can sort out the 5 yr olds behaviour. Teens can be horrible. It's probably nothing to do with your parenting. I'd try something shorter and cheaper so I wouldn't be as fuming if they ruined it.

I don't see this working as punishment. 5yo won't understand or remember, and a 13yo will probably feel relieved that she doesn't need to go on a family holiday anymore.or
Is there any chance to park the kids with grandparents and just have an adult only holiday?