Step Daughter won't drink

[BadgerBadgerMushroom]

Any ideas to get my 15 year old DSD to drink any form of liquid? I feel like we have tried everything. She can go a whole day and won't have a drink of anything. This is even harder when she is at school. We send her in with drinks they come home untouched. We've taken her shopping to choose something she likes...she doesn't drink it. If we make her a drink she will take it upstairs and not drink it. If she stays downstairs a half pint glass will take her over two hours to drink. We've even tried a timer once an hour to remind her and she refuses to stop what she is doing. We've told her she will end up in hospital but to be honest she doesn't seem bothered (although I know she would be if it came to that) She's fainted at school and we have an appointment for the doctors sorted but we are pretty sure she is dehydrated. It's a battle between letting her being independent and nagging her constantly. She just doesn't seem to be able to handle it herself. Any ideas or anyone in the same boat?

You can lead a step-daughter to water, but you can't make her drink.

Is she otherwise well? Do you assume she's dehydrated or is she actively showing worrying symptoms? Does she have special needs?

Will she eat high water content food eg watermelon?
Milkshake smoothie?

Maybe some form of bribery? It shouldn't come to that but needs must.

Or

Medical reports and facts. Sometimes kids listen to people other than their parents. Can the doctor have a strong word if you explain beforehand how obstinate she is?

Other than that there is no greater teacher than pain. She'll have to find out the hard way.

She sounds like me. And I know how stupid it is that I don't drink but sometimes I just can't physically seem to make myself drink. It's like I feel waterlogged. And if I try to drink it just kind of sits in my mouth.

I can easily go most of a day without a drink, and then drink a small glass of something to get me through the rest of the day. It's stupid and it's dangerous. And I'm trying to improve, so I imagine it's considerably more dangerous for her if she's not even trying.

What I find helps:

• Meeting people for coffee/ a drink.
• having a nice bottle to drink from.
• being pregnant (maybe don't float this to her as a good idea though! But I do drink when pregnant!)
• relaxing (something like watching a movie or doing a craft that I can sit and sip a drink at the same time).

Good on you for getting her a doctors appointment. I think it would have been great if someone had done that for me. Try to get on top of it now before it becomes really serious or really ingrained.

I have always been like this. I will typically only have a couple of glasses a day. I really dislike water but will obviously drink more if I can have tea/coffee etc. I’m perfectly fine.

Will she eat fruit & veg?

Will she eat ice Lillie's, grapes and other watery food?

My kids avoid drinking too much at (secondary) school because of the state of the toilets. They only use the loos in an emergency.

It's good that you have made a doctor's appointment because I'd worry too.

I don't drink an awful lot, maybe 2 or 3 mugs full over 24 hours. A pint of anything would take me ages. I just don't feel the need. If I force myself I feel really queasy and it all sloshes around in my stomach. I've never had a health problem with it. I also sweat very little, so that might be why I don't seem to need much?

I think some people do need less liquids than others

Thanks everyone. Your replies have made me feel a bit better. Really appreciated. We got her one of those bottles with the times on and thought we had cracked it but she shoved it in a cupboard and now won't drink from it because it's dusty. (I've put it through the dishwasher but 'it's got dust on' ) no special needs but is extremely fussy when it comes to food but that's another thread! Part of me thinks 'well she will learn when she gets poorly' but the other half of me is like 'what if she really does get ill?' I know teenagers can be very stubborn but I think overall it's the fainting that's worrying me now. Hopefully the doctor will be able to work out of it is dehydration or if it's something else (fingers crossed not)

@pikapikachu I never really thought about the toilet situation at school. Might be worth asking her. Thank you!

I sometimes get to the end of the day, only to realise that I've hardly had anything to drink. I often just don't seem to get thirsty. I do try and drink more, when I think about it, because I remember a GP telling me once when I had a UTI that in his opinion most people don't drink enough. He said when you have an infection, you should be drinking 3L a day to flush it out, but even when healthy, you should be having 2L, and that when you're thirsty, you're already dehydrated!

@watcherintherye great advice! I think if she even drank a little bit it wouldn't be so bad it's just she never does lol

I only drink diet coke. I know how mad that sounds, but it's all I drink. Never water. It started when I was at university, and the only times I haven't were during pregnancy when the smell made me gag. I am also someone who doesn't eat very much, except during pregnancy when I forced myself to do so, and I am generally okay. When I have an underlying illness, it hits me - maybe this would be a route to explore. (I am not advocating the gross way I live my life, just thinking that maybe there is more than one issue. Some tests will soon identify it, give her ownership over the process by letting her speak to the doctor herself.

Hi everyone. Thought I'd just update. went to the docs and she recommended a blood test. Waiting on results. As a positive I think the blood test scared DSD so much she's convinced she must have been dehydrated 😂😂 so has been drinking like a fish ever since. Oh the joys of teenagers!

😂😂 teenagers if she falls back tell her that if she gets hospitalized for dehydration they put a cannula in not just a needle

I think Pikachu is correct about the school lavatories, but for a different reason. I have several teacher friends and in secondary schools there’s a big problem with kids recording other kids on the loo then playing it back to the class and even (god forbid!) FILMING other kids using the loo by holding phones over the gaps between the cubicles. They have loads of girls who won’t drink anything during the day as a consequence. Could it be that?

@slippery haha will make sure I slip that into conversation not she slips back to her old ways!

@wombat oh god that sounds horrendous! I can't believe that!

I’ve no idea what my kids drink. I really think you are prob making a big fuss. If she’s eating I’m sure she has enough. I never monitor what my kids drink as my parents never did with me. We really don’t need to be sipping bottles of water all day long

If she likes love island, they do personalised water bottles that has your name printed on it, and the contestants all get one too, so this may help. If she likes coffee, I love the Nescafé gold caramel lattes too. HTH