Live with my DH, his 16DD and my 16DS. DSD isn't in touch with her mum very much but still sees maternal Gran.
Just after Christmas DSD started bringing a boy round to our house, pleasant enough lad, polite and chatty. She insisted he is just a friend even after light hearted ribbing that she can have a boyfriend at 16!
Then DSD disclosed to school in March that she'd been raped. We were very shocked. She refused to talk to us about it but chose to confide in Gran. DSD does have a habit of telling lies and can be quite attention seeking but we believed her and were as understanding as we could be with limited information. I tried to talk to her about it a couple of times, talked about counselling which she said school had offered her - but she was very tight lipped about the whole thing. Gran didn't know much either but told us that she had consented then changed her mind.
Boy 'friend' still coming round occasionally. Social Services then contacted my DH who want to come round to talk about the rape. During this meeting the social worker tells us that DSD said it was anal rape and told us the boys name which turns out to be the boy is actually the boy who has been coming here and drinking tea in our kitchen!! We were totally shocked as was the SW who had told DSD at a meeting at school and the boy + parents that ALL contact was to cease as she was now under Child protection. He was a danger to her and also my DS! School are keeping them apart.
We sat DSD down to talk about why she was still seeing him after what he had done and that she was not allowed to have anything to do with him, she hasn't realised the enormity of what she has done by reporting that he's raped her and involving school and the police and can't understand what all the fuss is about as she's forgiven him!!. She doesn't want to press charges against him. She STILL insists he's not her boyfriend.
We have now caught her with him a couple of times - we've seen them walking together down the street. We just don't know what to do.
The SW told us that if we can't keep them apart then we are failing as parents, and not keeping her safe - but she couldn't really give us an answer as to HOW we are supposed to keep her away from him when she is out of our sight!! She goes to Macdonalds a 15 minute walk away with her friends and out shopping, cinema etc in town. SW suggested taking her key off her, but that's not practical at all as me and DH both work fulltime.
She's a good kid really, bright and has got good projected grades for her GCSE's - but there has definitely been a change in her behaviour since she's been seeing him.
We have contacted SW to ask for a further meeting but not heard anything back yet!