Depression & self harming

[Mrsmymmamo]

My daughter is 14 has been feeling low since September and has gradually got worse. She has been self harming for about 6 weeks and also has trouble sleeping and expresses suicidal wishes. We’ve tried school councillors, a Haven centre in Guildford which haven’t helped. She has been referred to CAMHS but the wait is apparently 6 months. So now thinking we will have to go down the private route but what sort of therapy as there are different sorts? Also has anyone tried hypnotherapy for teenage depression? Want to avoid medication if at all possible.

So what does her GP say? It sounds like medication could be the only way. She's depressed, isn't she?

She’s been referred to CAMHS by GP yes. Doctor and us reluctant to go down medication route though, the side affects scare me so much.

The recommended therapies for depression are usually CBT and IPT- have a google.
You would want someone with a proper qualification not just a certificate. You can look at the BACP website for CBT therapists, you could also look at Clinical Psychologists (registered with the HCPC) as they are trained in a variety of therapies.

Also medication is not a recommended first line treatment; talking therapy is recommended first and then if this doesn’t help meds alongside.

If she has trouble sleeping try to lay with her at night and spend some time with her. I have been referred to CAHMs before and due to there massive workload the waiting list takes forever. They didn't do much for me and I was having similar issues. I would maybe take her to see a child psychiatrist privately as they are specialised in this, I know you don't like the idea of medication but it wouldn't be forever and I think it Would really help your daughter by the sounds of it. I think she needs more than counselling. X

Thanks for you posts.
Think we are now thinking medication alongside private therapy. Going to go back to the GP. She is so desperate to get herself back and it has been going on for 6 months now despite talking to 3 different councillors. She is well supported by good friends and we have a happy stable family life. She talks to us openly as we are close. I myself have suffered from depression so I blame myself as think she’s inherited this from me. It also gives me an insight into how horrible depression is. It’s horrific to see your child so distressed and feeling so wretched.

Hello Mrs have you looked at the other current thread on this - dd with self-harm? I've said loads on there so I won't duplicate here- i do feel reeeally strongly on this subject, with 2 troubled DDs myself plus working in mental health. I think the problem is we are at a very diffIcult place as a society- we understand that mental health problems should be taken as seriously as physical ill health, not stigmatised etc - which is very good. BUT - this is where the parallel breaks down. Mental health can't be easily fixed, there are NO treatments which definitely work and some will definitely make people get worse. Plus many people including my dd's don't fancy any of the help on offer. I feel we need a whole new way of understanding mental health which assumes that many of us will suffer depression and anxiety as a normal part of life and that the way through will be mainly about normal things like support and love from family and friends, passage of time, trying new things, self discovery to find what makes is feel better or worse, etc etc. If medication or counselling help then great but don't expect too much...they arent and never can be a 'cure'
I have been thinking a lot of the money in CAMHS could be better used supporting parents to help our kids as best we can, aware that there are many times when my feelings about my dd's problems are hugely unhelpful! Anger, frustration , sadness and overwhelming fear and panic all get in the way terribly at times. I wish so much I had someone to support me on this, especially as like you I have a history of depression and anxiety. I think the biggest point (sorry for the ramble) is that so many of us do and this is at least partly down to genetics as you say. But instead of seeing this as an illness we could see it as part of a bigger personality type which includes loads of strengths. Have you read 'The Highly Sensitive Person? 'This sums it up brilliantly and my older dd (18) has found it so helpful. Yes life is harder for a 'sensitive ' but it's also more fabulous in many ways, if we can learn to manage the intensity of our feelings. Coming back to CBT (and DBT) - this is one area where professional input can be useful.

We have tried 3 councillors already and she is deteriorating. Self harm increasing.

.... so it’s not first thing we’re going to?( If we go that route). ...

Thanks rosesxo ... what helped you in the end?