Advice please...

[Meandkids]

Hi, I have an 11 year old who is the youngest and smallest in his year group. First year at secondary.

He seems to have settled well. Luckily for us all he found his niche in sport. He is good at most sports and loves playing.
However his attitude if things aren’t going his way can be dreadful...

I need to find a way/mentor to talk to him about managing his emotions on a pitch/sports hall etc
He can react by saying something rude and inappropriate and I am concerned.

As his parents we take full responsibility for being so grateful that he found something a) he enjoyed and b) that he is good at. That maybe parenting has come second and we need some advice on not having him sit in front of tv as we have banned sports..

He puts pressure on himself to be great, we don’t even discuss upcoming games etc just say have fun and enjoy it.

How can I help him enjoy it without being so passionate about it - he may hate it.

He plays quite high level and is good as he is always challenged.

Much appreciated as feel a bit lost...

Do his coaches not pull him up on his behaviour?
My son plays 3 sports at a high level (and participates in many more) and none of his coaches (or team mates) would put up with that.
Passionate is great, determined is great, rude isn't.
When you say rude and inappropriate do you mean he swears at himself or others? There's a big difference

Slight issue I think is that his dad manages one of his sports teams and the coach of the other team is also a friends dad... perhaps he would be better playing where he had no relationship with coaches but tricky as been in same team for 6 years and have same group of players..
Swears at himself, waves his arms around if pass doesn’t get through... tricky player so gets fouled a lot and feels hard done by if no free kick is awarded...

To be honest, that behaviour sounds fairly normal. Our football coach is a friend's dad, he still pulls up the boys on bad behaviour. It's possible that what you're seeing as unacceptable is actually just passion and a desire for things to be fair. If nobody else has commented on the behaviour (and believe me they would) it may not be a huge issue.
If he's genuinely being fouled then his annoyance may not be misplaced.
Wait until he gets into older leagues, we're under 14s at the moment....it's an eye opener.

If my kid was swearing on the pitch then he would miss the next game. Fine to be passionate and want to do your best. Not ok to be a bad sport or swearing.