I dont't know where to turn...dd assaulted me last night.......

[crispyduck]

dd is very violent towards me & step father...this is tearing our family apart.
Any advice?

[CHOCOLATEPEANUT]

I agree that some children react to situations around them and you cannot for example tell a child off for swearing/fighting when that all they see at home.(I am not suggesting thats the case here by the way)

A child must be shown love, given time and have positive role models in thier parents. In my expereince children who lack these do have behaviour problems. However some children come from good and loving families and have of all these in abundance and still go off the tracks.This must be heartbreaking.

It comes down to one word RESPECT.That is usually earnt over the years but some just loose it when they reach a certain age and thier behaviour is dictated by thier friends not by how they have been raised.

In these cases the way foward must be consistent. Bad behaviour is not tolerated and they must learn that its getting them nowhere. Remove priveleges and reward good behaviour. Bad language whether a current trend should not be tolerated under any circumstances. How can a you command authority if you allow your child to tell you to "fuck off"? Remember your the parent.

I belive that disclipline,no matter how hard it feels, shows a child you do care and they can be turned around.

[crispyduck]

Thanks everyone for your advice...She was close to stepfather, we have been together for 10 years...the past year she has developed this crappy attitude which has drove a wedge between all of us, she hates everybody and anything iyswim...she started periods in March but has only had 2 periods..I told her if she ever lays a hand on me again or any member of the family I will go to police (hopefully it will never have to come to that)...she has been grounded for the next 2 weeks and pocket money is revoked..her phone was taken off her for a couple of days(I think that was the worst thing that happened as that is her lifeline to her friends)
Also I just dont know how to make her happy..

[suezee]

hi, im not making any excuse for ur daughter because what she has done to u is totally disgraceful, but have you thought about taking her to the gp..........with her only recently starting her periods she will be very hormonally inbalanced.the pill can help to regulate hormone inbalance as i originally went on it for conraception after the birth of ds, but it has helped the pms a lot,i have had to change it a couple of times as they werent suiting me 100%, u may bot like the idea of your daughter going on the pill but it might help u all as a family

[jcd]

new to this and I can see this is an old thread but domestic violence unit of our local police station were good, not just there for problems between adults. Our daughter now better at holding her temper but have at times been very scared of her.
Thoughts go out to anyone in these situations.