My teen DCs have had a few bday invites lately which have been ‘activities’/sleepovers, meals out, brunch etc. Thankfully they are finding some nice friends now.
Obv they can’t afford the gifting every time (I put money in an envelope unless DC wants to buy a specific gift). So my rule of thumb is -
The invitee pays ie, it’s a meal out. A card and if DC wants to buy a token gift then fine.
Paid-for activity or party - I put money in ranging from £10-20 depending on how good a friend they are and/or the activity.
Does this seem right? DD has been to things - I’ve given her a card with maybe a tenner in and no-one else has given so she’s brought it back (a boy’s party in Dec is one example). I would’ve just given it or left it on side but that’s up to her.
What do other parents/teens do? They don’t go to big anonymous parties so it’s always the (relatively small) bday party of a specific friend.