What age do you go to bed before your teen is home?

[maisiemackenzie]

DS is 16 and has a pretty hectic social life so he is quite often out of a night seeing bands play or at parties. I'm pretty chill with him having a reasonable amount of freedom because he is a sensible kid so he has a few drinks but doesn't really get into trouble.
Lately he has started wanting to stay out a bit later, until maybe 11.30, which I don't mind in theory.. but I find it so hard to stay awake until he gets home..
I'm kind of tempted to just go to sleep but I feel like I need to make sure he is safely home.. so I'm curious what age other people stop waiting up for them to be in?

One of us stays up - usually dh. There’s no way I could properly go to bed.

My dd is 17 and I still don't go to bed until she is in. Never normally later than midnight. Dreading it when she starts going clubbing.

With my oldest we stopped waiting up when they were 18, but I always heard him come in.
Before that I would wait up, so that limited the frequency they could go out and come back after 11 to the weekends and even then not every weekend- I need my sleep.

Luckily mine never went clubbing so were in by 1am at the latest.

If they are out on sleepover then I goto bed with phone just in case of any issues. We live very rurally so we have to pick up if they are coming home, therefore have to stay up. DD18 now clubbing in town 15 miles away - latest pick up so far 2:30am!

I always thought I'd be one of those mothers who sit up all night till they hear the key in the door.... But my god my head hits the pillow and I'm out.... Bu I always wake for a wee and check if they are in and if they aren't I never get back to sleep till they're home

We went to bed from about 15, but you have one ear open. Despite dd being 20 I still subconsciously listen out, called being a mum

And I mean clubbing late, I can't stay awake till 3am,but if they aren't home till 4ish I'm awake waiting for them

Ds is 17

From around the age they stopping wanting to be picked up which we were always willing to do and still offer to do. They text when they leave the venue and then when they are back in the house in case I'm alseep so all I need to do is check the phone without having to go traipsing round the house to see if they made it back.

Mine are both sensible though, not had any dramas which prevent me from falling asleep thank goodness.

Thanks for the replies. I really wish I could be someone who lightly snoozes until I heard him come in but I just pass out and am dead to the world!
I don't pick him up because I don't drive so he's quite often getting himself home on public transport. I think my instinct is probably that I need to keep waiting up for him a bit longer.. it's such a weird age when they are kind of like adults but also not!

15ish.
She'd poke me awake when she was home.
She's 17 now and sometimes goes out after I'm in bed.

80 😂

I used to pop into bed and read until l heard them come in. So at least l was nice and cosy and could drop asleep immediately.

Good question. Mine and her friends are around 16. Some of their parents go to bed, but I'd rather stay up and pick them up and know they are all home safely. Maybe when they're at sixth form and all actually 16 I might feel a bit more relaxed about it.

My eldest was away at University before I stopped listening out until he came in. I got more relaxed with the younger two.
However, it doesn't happen much, as, at 16, I was still picking them up. I don't think I'd be too comfrotable with them regularly 'having a few drinks' and also 'making their own way home'.

I still have half an ear open and usually gear them even if I go to sleep. The convention is that the last one in turns the light out so if I wake up I know if they are home.

We used to have an alarm set, on the landing. Would set it for a sensible curfew (age dependant obviously!). Child would come in and switch it off on their way to bed. If they didn't come home, it would go off and wake us.

Happened a few times, but generally didn't.

That way I could sleep soundly knowing I'd wake if they didn't come back by a certain time.

We have a passage light system which I can see from my bedroom. The party-goer turns off the light when they get in, so if I wake and open my eyes I know they're home - or not.

This was as a result of a panicked night when I thought I was awake and waiting for ds but he didn't come home and didn't come home 2am, 3am 4am... I sent him frantic text messages, tried ringing - phone turned off. At the point I wake dh and we start discussing calling the police we checked his room and there was ds sound asleep. I'd obviously slept soundly through his arrival home well before midnight.

We had to leave our shoes at the bottom of the stairs to show mum that we were home by the time she got up for a middle of the night wee. But then again I was allowed 'out' before I was 18 ( had to tell her every movement and couldn't involve alcohol/fun).

Dd is 17 and I would wait up.

She never goes out at night when she’s at home but I know that at college she sometimes goes out for a meal with friends, or to the cinema & when she is performing she can be late. Not past 11pm though.

11.30pm is not really very late for a 16 year old! I'm surprised you have managed to get them home earlier than that. I am flexible on time but they have to text when they are on their way home otherwise I start calling. I tend to stay up for the 16 year old but I am a late bird and often up till 12.30 or 1.

My DD started clubbing at 17-18 so I had to get used to going to sleep before she got back as she didn't get home till 4am. But she is very sensible so I got used to it. Last one in is supposed to turn the landing light off and lock up - so I know if I wake that they are back okay.