16yo son is becoming reclusive

[welliemum64]

My son is due to leave school this summer but seems to be going a bit into his shell. He doesn't have any friends his own age outside of school. He doesn't want to see any school friends utside of school (which is about 10 miles away) so he spends all his free time with us, watching TV, not doing any exercise and looking at a screen! He has two friends (who he met at scouts years ago) who are two years older but they're moving on with their lives with girlfriends, college and are now allowed to drink, which limits what he can do with them. He's adamant he doesn't want to go to college and meet new people his own age and seems quite anxious about that. He's heard stories about kids getting threatened outside college with knives and having their phones stolen, which makes him even more anxious. He's a very practical and techy kid, so he really wants to do an apprenticeship and just get straight into work as he's not at all academic. He has his own disco business on the side which he's done since he was 14 so he's confident in that respect. I know it's just anxiety of leaving the safety of his school (where he's been for nearly 8 years) and we do talk a lot and have an open relationship which helps. He's also on the autistic spectrum but not severely, which probably makes him more sensitive. Any advice welcomed.

Could the college arrange some sort of special open/introductory day or days for just him or a handful of similar students? Have you contacted them? This would help allay some fears. If he is interested in tech stuff and an apprenticeship then someone could talk to him about the help they would be able to give to choose courses to get onto a good apprenticeship, this might spur him on. If he is not academic they will steer him towards the more appropriate subjects for him.

Re the stories of the violence the only way you are going to get on top of these fears is to find out some truths, ask the college and check any crime stats for that area online. One incident may have got blown out of proportion?

You can't force him to go out and do exercise but at his age (15/16yrs) you can limit the amount of TV he watches. You could also give him more chores to do around the house or to the local shop to make sure he is at least moving around and doing something.

I am really worried about my 16 year old son. He has a twin sister she is sociable and very independent. My son spends all his time in his room he doesn't even come downstairs when family are over. He refuses to go anywhere he has no social life. I'm worried he is a nerd, all he does is study, I think he wants to be a human google. He doesn't watch tv or play video games. He's gone so far at self teaching him self that he has challenged teachers their teaching methods, then told to take over the class which he happily did. He's become a classical music pianoist self thought. Played in the Royal Albert Hall in London. My 27 year old daughter wants me to get him checked, she's addement he's autistic. I know he's not. He was normal before. He's changed in the past 3 years. I am really worried, what shall I do