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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Driving lessons...

19 replies

tactum · 22/01/2019 06:50

We have DD nearly 17 and Ds 15. Both keen to learn to drive as soon as they can - me and DH both learnt at 17 and loved it. Also we live in a smallish village so trips to meet up with friends involve lifts or an occasional bus (crap timetable). So it makes sense and is also I think a valuable life skill and experience to get under your belt.

So we are comfortably off, and could fund lessons for both. But we don't really spend lots generally on the kids - they have an allowance each month but have to pay for half their phones out of it, buy clothes etc. DD doesn't currently have a job as GCSES coming up, but wants one after they're done. DS has a job.

So what do people in our position do re funding driving? Just pay for it all? Buy them a block of lessons, help them practice and then maybe go halves or something??

Both the kids seem to have an expectation they will be at least part funding it (DS has talked about opening a savings account and putting money away every month for this). But they have so much coming up money wise with uni etc should we just take this burden off them?

Don't want to appear either too generous or too mean! My parents were much less well off than me (but lessons were only £5 in 1987!). I got a block of 10, unlimited time in the car with my dad n then they paid for the test. Anything else was down to me.

What have you done with yours? God sorry that turned out to be so long!

OP posts:
CatToddlerUprising · 22/01/2019 06:56

I think pay for the lessons and they have to pay for the car and insurance

roundthehorn · 22/01/2019 07:02

Could you get them a block of ten as a birthday/graduation present? With extra practise time with a parent/adult that should be enough to get them through their test and they can then put the money set aside for lessons towards a first car.

derekthe1adyhamster · 22/01/2019 07:03

When I was learning, I paid half through my part time job. DS is learning at the moment, we can't afford to help but he's got some savings he's been using. We can't afford a car or to even insure him on ours, so once he's passed his test he won't be driving until after he's graduated and can self fund

1Wanda1 · 22/01/2019 07:09

I think of learning to drive as an essential life skill, especially if you live rurally. I'd pay for the lessons, and maybe also the car, but make it clear that the DDs have to save up for their first year's insurance (and continue to do so thereafter) and pay for that. As insurance is likely to be about £2k a year, this will teach them about the real costs of driving.

lljkk · 22/01/2019 09:27

Where I live is mostly rural & mostly low income area. Most families just pay for it if they can possibly afford it. Insurance is the one thing I would absolutely pay for myself, too; it's easy for young adults to let that lapse if their money gets tight.

I told DC I would only contribute after they turned 21, though. We are eco-freaks who want our DC to use public transport or cycle.

Furrycushion · 22/01/2019 09:34

We paid for it for ours. It is a life skill that if they had to find they might not get round to it. I realise we/they are fortunate though. To those saying theirs will learn & then not drive until they are older, don't do it,just get them to learn later. They do most of their learning just after passing. Passing then not driving for 3 years is positively dangerous. I know someone who did that & she had to have lessons all over again

Sparklingbrook · 22/01/2019 09:34

We paid for all DS1's lessons.

Doing the same now for DS2.

dalmatianmad · 22/01/2019 09:38

I bought dd a few for her 17th and she funded the rest herself, she paid for her theory and practical (she works part timr). We got her a cheap car. She passed last week and I've paid for her insurance outright (£1.400) out of some savings.

Hen2018 · 22/01/2019 12:28

I put my son on my car insurance and taught him to drive. He’ll have 3 or 4 lessons before his test to perfect the manoeuvres, like I did.

icannotremember · 22/01/2019 12:29

we live in a smallish village so trips to meet up with friends involve lifts or an occasional bus (crap timetable). So it makes sense and is also I think a valuable life skill and experience to get under your belt.

So we are comfortably off, and could fund lessons for both.

Fund their lessons then!

Bellagio40 · 22/01/2019 12:32

I bought a block of 10 weekly lessons for my 17 year old and after lesson 4, he practiced with me. I then paid for a further lesson just before the test

DeadBod · 22/01/2019 12:36

I've paid for both sets of lessons and since learning to drive is going to save you some inconvenience then I think you should too.
We can't afford to buy them a car so they share mine on condition that they drop us off or pick us up from nights out occasionally Smile

Oddsocksandmeatballs · 22/01/2019 12:37

I bought them a block of lessons for their 17th birthdays, then put them on my insurance and took them out in my car, we jointly funded any extra lessons they needed and they bought and paid for, their own cars once they were 18.

bugaboo218 · 22/01/2019 12:40

I paid for DD lessons (3 hours a week), brought her a car and insured it. Can you not pay for it all?

TeenTimesTwo · 22/01/2019 15:54

We fully funded learning to drive.

Then when DD1 finished college to start an apprenticeship, we paid her first year's insurance upfront, explaining that she then had to save to pay the next year and other car costs.

I view learning to drive as a useful skill for life and therefore we funded it - just like we did swimming lessons when younger. (Owning a running a car is another matter.)

dontknowwhattodo80 · 22/01/2019 17:39

DS1 (15) is also keen to learn as soon as he can. I've held back a lump of money for it and I'm planning on giving him driving lessons for his birthday too

WaxOnFeckOff · 22/01/2019 21:12

I have DSs 18 and 17. Probably not as comfortably off as you but neither DSs have jobs - yet...

For their 17th birthday they were offered either a gift of their choosing plus some cash towards lessons or driving lessons/licence/tests until they passed. They both (wisely) chose the latter. Both have now passed. They had about 20-25 official lessons, Both passed the theory first time, both passed their test on the 2nd attempt. In addition, DH would insure the car for 2 hours at a time and take them out for extra practice. We didn't do that until they's had a fair few lessons.

We'd said for Uni we'd either pay travel (if local) or accommodation (if away from home). As DS1 goes reasonably local (goes daily on train) we bought (and insured) a small car for them to share and he had exclusive use of it first to get himself to and from school and then for getting to train station and back. Ds2 just passed so he's been added to the insurance and they are sharing. It looks like he might be moving for uni so DS1 will probably get full use of the car while he is away but that will be balance out by the extra cost of DS2s accommodation.

I accept that they are spoiled.

WaxOnFeckOff · 22/01/2019 21:19

Meant to add that insurance (up to 6000 miles) with a box was around £700 for DS1 (age 17 and newly passed, driving a nearly new but small car) and it cost me an extra £100 (plus £25 admin fee) to add on DS2 for 3 months til the policy needs renewed.

corythatwas · 22/01/2019 22:05

I regard ds' driving lessons as part of his education, just as much as his maths tuition- he will almost certainly be looking at the kind of job where driving will be a requirement. Dd not so much: there are more important things to help her with.

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