So this week my DD was "inappropriately touched" at school by a male friend (he touched her bottom and breast during a hug). The school have taken it very seriously (internal exclusion etc) and are going to talk to the whole school about consent etc. The thing is a couple of her other friends are now saying he did similar to them when they dated him (they were 13/14 at this point). One isn't going to say anything but the other is talking about reporting him as when they dated he fingered her, touched her bottom etc. The thing I'm struggling with is none of them said stop to him or apparently gave any clue they weren't ok with the situation. Now I'm not victim blaming/saying it was ok but if they let him then is it ok to report him? I'm very wary of this turning into some sort of witchhunt. He certainly needs to be dealt with and talked to but it's easy to make him sound like some sort of deviant when he is probably just a kid who wants to experiment and needs to know what is and isn't ok. DD is asking for my advice and I'm struggling to find the right thing to say (about her friends situation I mean, I'm sure I've said the right things about what happened to her - not her fault etc etc).
Any advice would be welcomed! I appreciate I may be completely in the wrong in my thinking but I need to know I'm protecting my DD and her friends but I don't want this to turn into something bigger than it possibly is!