WWYD let DS go to Latin America on hols with GF

[NotOnTheBench]

GFs family have offered to take my DS16 on their family holiday next spring (2020). I'm uneasy about this. They are too young for that kind of commitment + we can't know if they'll still be together?

We took her on a short holiday last summer with us but in UK and we'd planned on DS18 (at the time) + his GF coming but they broke up beforehand so DS15's (at the time) GF came with us instead. We figured that as we'd stayed close to home we could always go home if things went wrong and we hadn't planned the hols in advance.

This is a generous offer but I just think it's too much. Don't get me wrong - I do love GF but in the same way as I loved DS19s ex.

They (DS19+GF) were meant to be saving for hols together + broke up partly as my DS19 couldn't commit to saving any money for it + she got fed up.

How do we know that DS16+GF will stay together esp with GCSEs and then A-levels to come.

Any opinions please? Am I being too prissy or too cautious?

Will they be paying for your DS? I would like it at one of two ways depending on the answer- 1) They’re paying for it- can you/DS afford to reminburse the parents if the relationship ended? 2) if you’re paying- can you/DS afford the trip and afford to lose the money if they broke up?

If he'll be almost 18 I don't really think it's your decision to make. Unless you're paying.

ghostsauce - he'll be 17 then, but only 16 now.

CatToddlerUprising: they are paying his deposit, partly because we bailed them out when they had a bit of a crisis last year. This is their way of paying us back, which is a lovely gesture, but just not sure about the 'ethics' / practicalities. We could pay them back but that's not really the point?

Good God. Just no. They're teenagers. One of them will probably go to a party and snog someone else next month. Now that would make for an awkward fortnight in the sun. Too much pressure much too young. Makes it hard to break up if things are going wrong.

I think my response was due to taking emotions out of it. If my DD was in your son’s position then we wouldn’t be able to afford paying them back if they broke up- that would be a massive concern of mine. I think you should let him go but set out with the parents what would happen if they broke up