does anyone give their young teen an allowance

[blueskiesandforests]

Does anyone give their 13/14 year old an allowance for all non essential spending? So more than pocket money, meant to replace all casual cash hand outs?

DD currently gets pocket money which she's responsible with, but there are a lot of ad hoc non essentials she still asks for money for.

Does anyone give their young teen a larger amount than pocket money but with an absolute ban on handing out any other adhoc cash?

Is this successful? How much do you give them? What do you still pay for? Do they budget well or run out of money half way through the month?

I didn't do it until DS1 was in sixth form it then he was never very spendy and wasn't often asking for cash or clothes.

I'd do it for a younger teen who had lots of wants. Work out roughly what you currently give her for luxuries and let her manage that herself.

For DS1 inpay fpr his cadet camps, bus pass and clothes because I'd hate to be in a position where he couldn't go because he'd spent up and because if he had to buy clothes himself he'd be wearing rags, but he buys all his music, social activities and "stuff"

Bestseller that's what I'm thinking - we pay her football subs by direct debit anyway, and she gets a free bus pass because of being of compulsory school age and more than 3 miles from any secondary school (that's how it works where we live). We have no school uniform and she loves buying clothes, though her tastes are sensible and I 100% trust her to choose and buy her own clothes. The fact we have no school uniform means I'll have to allow a bit more for clothes and shoes as I'm not buying her uniform... I'll still buy all her school stationery items (we buy everything here including every last exercise book, paints and brushes for art etc).

I need to think hard about how much to give her as in her case it's important it includes clothes. She already sometimes spends pocket money on clothes when I say I'm not paying for that item (unnecessary extra pair of every day shoes 2 days after I'd spent a lot of money on a new pair of her choice for example). I think k her feet have stopped growing so I will probably include shoes... It's hard though to draw the line - perhaps I pay for one winter and one summer pair seperate from the allowance, and for football boots and hall shoes... She has strong preferences about sports kit...

Just want to get the boundaries straight I think!

I did/do, but dd is 18yo now. But started it when she was 11yo.

So she got a monthly allowance into a bank account but I also paid for hairdresser, essential clothes, anything for school, monthly phone contract, toiletries, school dinners.

So allowance was for non essential clothes, make up, sweets, lunch out with friends, cinema, etc. She'd get a double allowance at end of Nov to help with buying Xmas presents. Think she started off at £20 and has just gone up to £50 a month.

Thanks NicoAndTheNiners - DD and her younger brothers always had their school year per week as pocket money paid monthly, so when she was 11 she had 24€ per month, atm she gets 32€ per month. I call that pocket money, it covers going into town with her friends, buying presents except for birthday parties ahe is invited to, when I pay as 15€ voucher plus a token chocolate or toiletry item seems to be standard... She pays for frivolous clothing ovwr and above what I think she needs...

I'm thinking of expanding what it covers and upping the amount but being rigid about it. Not sure how feasible it is but although shes "good" and "sensible" there is always something eminently reasonable sounding which she "needs" / wants. I seem to spend so much more on her than her 11 year old brother, despite them going to the same school, having similar hobbies, similar numbers of friends... I want to give her her own budget to be in control of without recourse to asking me for money, but I'm unsure quite where to saw the lines. She definitely needs to be budgeting for hwr own clothes though!

I started off being quite rigid but have probably weakened. She had some serious lack of friendship issues in years 9-10, so when she made new friends and wanted extra money for lunches out/cinema I never felt I could say no!

Hairdressers is actually an interesting one - I think I'd like that to be in her budget. She likes going to the hairdresser. She goes more often than I can afford to, partly because her brothers have short hair so need it cut every 8 weeks - DD has a long Bob ATM, recently cut from half way down her back. She's had extensions in shades of purple before as a summer holiday treat. She doesn't need to go 8 weekly with long hair imo but I agree to it for the sake of fairness with her brothers. I'm lucky to go 6 monthly myself. Our hairdresser charges by year of age for under 16s for a straightforward wash and cut so she's cheaper than an adult though.

Mine are adults now but I did from age 11.
I paid school things and phone contacts but any other things like can cinema they paid for.

NicoAndTheNiners yep that's tricky if there are friendship issues and lack of money stops her getting back out there! I'd weaken too. I guess I'll cross that bridge if we come to it.

Dd gets £120 per month from that she pays for clothing I might decline to buy (rarely as she isn't very interested and I can't remember ever declining either tbh), spending on trips out, birthday and Christmas gifts for friends and family and anything else she wants. I pay for her phone contract as it's on a direct debit. She spends and saves as she chooses but would know that there will be no advances so not to ask for more.

We started at 12 with a monthly allowance of £40. She’s 14 now and had a paper round too as she needed the money -that brings in £30 pm.

We buy school uniform, school shoes and any other school supplies eg stationery, trips etc. Also hair dresser. When she had very bad acne I kept her supplied with concealer but it’s gone now so make up is up to her to cover. We pay for her train pass and singing lessons/exams etc.

She has to buy all clothes, shoes, music (Spotify), going out/socialising and presents for friends (although I have occasionally helped when she has several birthdays at once). She gets double just before Christmas. She also spends birthday and Christmas money on clothes.

She generally manages quite well.

My kids are all still at primary but I had an allowance from about 14. I had to pay for my school lunches and clothes out of it (also had no uniform). I think it's a really sensible idea and will do the same with our kids. Mum still bought me stuff, but I'm nearly 50 and she still buys me random 'presents' when she's visiting.

I'm thinking maybe 100€ per month to include all clothes and shoes and hairdresser and presents for birthday parties, which seem to run at about 18€ - 20€ all in, as well as everything pocket money already covers. She currently asks for 2-3€ when she goes to (free) youth club for a drink and snack, and I think she should start paying for that but she might go less as a consequence...

We pay football subs.

I'm not sure whether she should pay phone or we should, but I guess we will. She's on a tayg tarrif with a small amount of data - only really enoufh for WhatsApp without the WiFi.

Her bus pass is free. We're rural and the bus service is reliable but very limited so we'll always taxi her to things til she's old enough to drive - that's not her fault.

Obviously we pay for school stationery items, which probably cost 150€ per year. Even there there are grey areas as she likes stationery and drawing and not everything she asks for is essential, though it is all used at school. So many pretty colours of ink aren't really essential school supplies...

I honestly can't decide whether 100€ is too much or too little! It's probably less than I end up spending on her though ... As it is too include clothes and shoes and we have no uniform so she'll be wearing the clothes and shoes to school should it be more? Perhaps 120€...

DD is 13, she gets £40 a month directly into her bank account. This is for non essential clothes, going out with friends (hot chocolates, sweets etc) and odds and ends. I pay club subscriptions, essential clothes, hair cuts and phone contract.

I started at 11 too, now 13. £40 a month into a current account for non essentials.

I buy all clothes, shoes, pay for music lessons, junior masters swimming, tennis lessons, anything essential for school, hair cuts, phone contract.

It is used for things like today's purchases - a gift for me (a Christmas scented candle), a colouring book and some new colouring pencils. Coffee shop with friends, books.

DD is very tight and has about £250 in her current account through not spending much!

DD has applied and been approved for a peer tutoring job within her school - older kids with good grades can apply to tutor younger ones who are struggling in a specific subject. That will pay 8€ per 45 minutes which is bloody good going at 13! Only snag is she hasn't been allocated a tutee yet, and it's out of her hands til she is.

The paperround in our village has "belonged" to one family for years, passed around the siblings, so that's not an option.

Once she's 15 she'll have lots of options, but just at the moment the law combined with our location limit her work options.

Who said she should get a job blue, have I missed something?

I had a job from the age of 14 (1982) because my parents didn't have much spare cash but don't expect DD to get a job because she doesn't need to.

Working hard at school and music and tidying up after herself/joining in with things like setting the table is good enough for me.

From age 12, I was given £120 a month but everything was my responsibility. That included clothes, school uniform, toiletries, all activities (they paid for my regular clubs but anything outside of that). They'd never have left me without school uniform if I hadn't saved, but it was made clear that it was my job to budget for it. I also had to put money into savings.

I'm now 29 and still thank them for doing that because I know how to budget; it's just natural to me. So when my 2 are teens, I will be doing the same. I'm never going down the route of "just ask when you need money".

Toomanybaubles nobody directly said that she should get a job, crazycrofter was just posting about her DD getting a paperround.

Holstenlane yes that's the kind of arrangement I'm thinking of.

We are about to do this for 14 year old ds. Has a debit card and pin number, £30 a month for things like subway when out with friends, haircuts, presents, clothes if he fancies a t-shirt he spots. Want to teach him how to save and that when it's gone it's gone....

With inflation, if say 150 a month If you can afford it? But try to enforce the "save 15%" rule.

Yes I realise paper rounds are hard to come by - there’s no local paper by us so dd has to do a round in my parents’ village, a ten minute drive away. We couldn’t really afford to pay her an extra £30 pm though and also - I wouldn’t want to have to pay ds (12) the extra £30 pm when he doesn’t really need it. So it works for us with them both having £40 and dd earning the extra she needs.

I think girls need more money - she would struggle on £40 pm whereas ds just needs the occasional Xbox game! And sweets...

Mine gets £80 per month. She is 14. This is meant to cover all non-essential clothing and social activities etc. I pay her phone contract on top and buy school stuff and general toiletries. If she wants something special she is meant to pay. She is actually quite good at saving it. She is planning to do a first aid certificate at school next year and is then hoping for some baby sitting jobs. I am hoping this doesn't mean I have to then collect her from random places at midnight...

I meant to add - she has a bank account and card.