Boy Girl sleep over

[DaniEvans]

My son is 13, has lots of friends and one of them happens to be a girl (also 13).

They met a couple of years ago when they started high school and often face time each other in the evening.

A couple of months ago in the summer holidays he started sleeping over at her house o

Occasionally, at first I wasn’t sure how I felt about it but her mum would text me to say how well behaved he was and that he was no trouble.

He insists they’re just mates and I have no reason to not believe him.

Whenever I mention this to friends or family they automatically joke saying that he’s probably getting up to ‘no good’ and ‘they’re teenagers- of course they’ll be experimenting’ etc

But surely if they was any suggestion of inappropriate behaviour the girls mum wouldn’t have my son stay over?

I feel a bit sad that people have jumped to conclusions, even though they’re ‘joking’. I don’t regard myself as naive but now I’m starting to feel confused 🤷‍♀️

This is ok isn’t it? There has been no indication of misbehaviour- would you be ok with this?

I did this with quite a few male friends as a teenager and nothing ever happened. Trust your child.

Yes it’s fine, I had 2 male friends as a teenager and we had sleepovers and nothing happened.

And even if they do experiment a little, is it the end of the world if the friendship is equal?

I have DD and would have no problem with this. I would have separate beds mind you, even if the girl has a double, he should be in camp bed or floor in sleeping bag.

Thanks ladies - I was starting to doubt myself!

Parenting is hard isn’t it!

God yes! 😂

Absolutely fine, no problem at all.

Until they step over the invisible line that you don't see, and have unprotected sex, and the girl gets pregnant.

For me, it's not about trust, it's about helping protect them from an impulsive, stupid, decision/act.

If you're so worried, insist on hosting the next sleepover at your house. Then you will know what happens/doesn't happen.

For me, at 13, it is also about setting boundaries you want to have when they are 15. So put them in place before they are needed. Otherwise, when you want to put them in place you'll get ^but you let me sleep over at X's house, so why not Y ...'