17 Year old daughter not showering - read on Internet we shower too much!

[soulsurfer64]

My 17 year old is no trouble at all, never have to push her re homework or revising, lovely nature, kind etc but despite several discussions she isn't showering every day, can go up to 3 days and then we have to keep on.
She is quite intelligent and when I asked her why she doesn't want to shower she has told me that she has read several articles on the Internet that say that we - humans, shower too much. Scientists and academics have undertaken studies and there is no need to shower every day, it drys out the skin and kills off good bacteria and makes us more prone to illness and infection. I explained that she is 17, she sweats a lot, she has greasy hair and has regular periods. That certain areas of our bodies need to be washed every day. I said if she has an issue with washing her arms, legs, body for fear of them 'drying' out (she has no dry skin problems) then she can stand in front of the sink and have a wash with a flannel of her under arms, her private areas (back and front) and feet. The look she gave me said 'not doing that'. I said for the sake of having a 10-15 minute shower why would she want to have a flannel wash? She persisted, in a calm manner to explain the information on the Internet. I got nowhere. She has an elder sister (+7 years) who has always showered daily, so is a good example, but in response to me telling her that, she said 'well we are not alike in several ways and this is no different'. I gave up and walked out (before I screamed). What am I to do? I'm planning on another discussion where I explain that I don't agree with the amount of time teenagers spend on their devices. That I've had a look at some information on the Internet that confirms my concerns so I will be restricting her access to her devices effective immediately! Anyone had a similar problem and how did you handle it?

If the OP said she did smell I'd say: tell her she smells. It's still her decision though, at 17.

She's 17 and finding out who she is. You stressing about her decisions will only drive her away, surely?

I think you are way over involved here. I don’t recall my parents having any idea how often I showered at that age. They certainly didn’t police it or comment on it. You are being controlling and she is (because she is clearly well brought up girl) telling you my body, my choice.

She is 17, nearly an adult. Her personal hygiene is her own business. You trying to punish her will only make her more entrenched in her position. Just leave her to it.

I also note the irony of going to an internet forum to complain about your daughter believing and acting on stuff she has read on the internet.

Why are you policing a 17 year olds shower habits?

I have 2 teens and two other adults in my house. I have no idea how frequently any of them shower. None smell, so not my business.

When i was young showers weren’t common in many houses, we didn’t get one until the late 80’s. Baths two or three times a week were normal.

I can go longer than 3 days and don't smell (I use a flannel for a quick wash on a morning). It hurts my skin and my hair takes forever. If she wipes pots and bits then every 3 days is fine...

And periods don't make you gross or need to wash loads...

... and I've never had boils from not washing...

Does she smell? I stink if I don't shower daily (sometimes twice) but we are all different I guess.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Agree that daily showering is unnecessary. I grew up with a bath every two days (we didn't have showers back then and I hated them for years because my only experience was in dank camping site toilet blocks inhabited with spiders and daddylonglegs!)

I've kept to that rule more or less ever since (though prefer showers these days) and expect similar of my teens, but I don't police them, just give reminders a couple of times a week. I'm sure my 18 yo goes 3 or more days without bothering quite often. Sometimes she does smell and I suggest a shower but her main response is to spray more fragrance around! I've explained this doesn't exactly work but she's not convinced! Let it go. It's saving your gas / electricity bills.

By the way at 17 I went on a three week camping trip and only had about 5 showers in all that time. Also wore the same t shirts several times as we did no clothes washing. We even made fun of one guy who would only wear a t shirt once before washing it. Times have changed but none of us died or suffered from being unwashed (though admittedly passersby might have!)