Can’t take much more right now teenager stuff

[Strugglingmum1980]

To cut a long story short I sadly lost my mum to alcoholic liver failure and clearly that’s having a massive impact on my kids and me.

Today my daughter took it upon herself to go to school and tell the I kick and hit her.

No I’m not denying I smack my kids, itsnot a regular thing but there comes a time when they might be fighting and I have no choice but to resort to a smack before they seriously hurt each other. I never mark them and be lucky if they even have temporary redness and I don’t kick them.

She has also said that me and her dad get into physical fights when he’s drunk which is a load of crap (for want of a better word)

We did have a massive fight in September time (me and her dad) it was verbal not physical and I throw the remote at the wall missed and hit the tv probably wasn’t the best thing I’ve done but the kids wasn’t in the house so didn’t witness it. Clearly they asked what happened to the tv and I told them the truth.

I also occasionally throw his pillows down stairs maybe twice a year and tell him to sleep down there but frankly don’t think that’s a big deal.

Yes I don’t like the fact he gets drunk but that’s an issue I have stemming from my mum being an alcoholic (abusive one at that).

I get she’s angry and that she’s grieving and I’m the closest so I’m getting it. It’s a little more complicated as my oldest a few years back pulled the same stunt but she had attachment disorder and a borderline personality disorder.

My 15 year old knows full well how that effected me and how heart broken I was and at a guess that’s why she’s doing it as she’s angry and grieving and looking for someone to blame for my mother’s death but the fact is the only one that could change that outcome was my mum.

I’m now so stressed out as I already have anxiety and depression. I honestly felt like the teachers was interagating me and I can’t copy with all this right now as I’m trying to deal with my own grief.

Social services are coming Monday, I went doctors after going to school and he’s upped my meds and put me on a short course of diazepam.

I’m a nervous reck and really can’t deal with the whole SS thing right now.

Oliver please don’t project what you went through onto what my daughter is going through. Me and my partner had one argument. I never said it was ok nor did I say it was a regular thing. Add in the fact my children wasn’t there.

I’m fully aware what a disfunctional family looks like and us like as I already said my mother just died of alcoholic liver failure and that kind of thing doesn’t happen over night.

Thank you naughty. If people truly knew half of what I and my family are going through and been through. They wouldn’t be so quick to judge.

My partner is not my eldest daughters biological father. Her issues stem from her past before I meet my partner and we have supported her through so much and constantly pushed for her to get help.

In regards to my 15 year old she’s been through a lot. Not like my eldest or anything like that but losing two close friends and now my mum it’s bound to cause her pain and I fully understand why she’s directing her anger towards me.

I can’t say who I am but to say I’m very well respecting in my community and everyone around me knows if they need help I’m always there. So those that want to call me names and say I’m awful. Get a grip as judging people isn’t very nice and you might want to consider that as it’s very counter productive.

I came here looking for support from others because I’m struggling with my greif and anxiety and the added guilt that comes with losing a loved one who was an addict well trying to handle what my daughter has done But sadly it seems some would rather jump to conclusions 😔 sad as I always for mums net was to support each other through the good and bad. 😢