Dilema about my teens friends-pregnant?

[minorityrules]

One of my daughters friends (age 16) has confided in her she hasn't had a period for 13 weeks. She has been sexually active and he last boyfriend was in this time frame

My daughter has been trying for 2 weeks to get her to go to the local clinic for a test and advice but she is putting it off (arranging to go but pulling out at the last minute

My daughter is really concerned (she has already accompanied a number of friends to the clinic for contraception, bit of a busy body but well educated in these matters)

I have asked if the girl would like me to talk to her/take her but she knows I want her to talk to her parents and won't meet me (I don't know her that well and have never met her parents)

What do I do? Should I give her an ultimatum ie come with me to clinic and I'll help her deal with her parents? Stay out of it and let daughter keep trying? Would her parents have a problem me if I get involved? Should I call the school?

I am so concerned about this girl. If she is pregnant, she needs to get her options sorted and she is running out of time for one of them.

I just don't know what to do

Buy a home test and get DD to give it to her, on stand by to offer advise and and support to tell parents. (who I find are always shocked but mostly come round after a week a start knitting bootees)

sorry dont know if this'll help at all but mayb buy a preg test and give it to ur DD to try to convince her mate to at least do a home test.

It might just b a fantum pregnancy - i had 1 when i was a kid, i got so stressed when i missed a P that i ended up missing 2, in the end i did a test and was clear - i came on the nxt mth......

Hope this help.......Good luck

I think that's a great idea. If it is positive, seeing the proof with her own eyes will really bring it home to her that she can't just ignore this and hope it goes away. If you can be there for her as a "mediator" ready and willing to talk to her parents if needs be, I think that would be a great relief to her as well.

Of course, if it's negative, you might encourage your daughter (who sounds wonderfully clued-up and responsible by the way)to persuade the girl to visit a clinic to get some contraception advice sorted so she can hopefully avoid this stress in future.

it sounds like a good idea to get the girl a home test to do in private-with a friend there for support. this is very scary when you are 16 (i was pg at 16).

I confided in a family friend, who took me to my parents house to tell them. i was about 7 weeks, and wanted my baby. my parents were fine; however it helped so much to have another adult there for what felt like help and support, it also felt like they would stop my parents from going nuts, which is what i needed.

if this girl does not want her baby, she is very fast running out of time. she could already be 13/14 weeks.

this sounds like a weird question, but was she a virgin before this bf? its just me and most of my friends had no periods for a bit after having sex for the first time.

i do think maybe that time has gone on long enough with this, and your daughter has tried very hard. could you meet your dd and dd's friend after school one day next week, for dinner?just you 3? and then you could help her and discuss her options-tell her she an see her GP confidentially, there are clinics, etc. she may also need an STI check, especially if pg.

I don't personally, speaking from experience, think ultimatems are going to help. she will be scared and probably burying her head.

Good Luck

buy her a home test and once she know the resuult that you are there if she needs to talk things over.

if she wont go to a clinic a home test is probably the best idea, i had a friend who was worried about doing this, we were 20, so in order to make her feel better and as there were 2 tests in the pack we did one each....sounds silly but it made her take it, luckily for her she wasnt pg and it was most probably stress as she had just broken up with her b/f and loast her job. Theres not much else you can do atm, a test might make her take things more seriously.

It's good news. We persueded her to go to the clinic. The test was negative

She is now on the pill with a bucket load of condoms lol And a flea in her ear over unprotected sex

Glad it's over and glad she isn't mine

oh, phew! so pleased this worked out for you!