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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Quick straw poll - 16 yo DS home alone overnight. Yes or no?

28 replies

Totopoly · 10/07/2018 13:45

He is my oldest, so not sure. Younger ones will be elsewhere. I need to be away for work for one night, tonight (last minute). DS says he will be fine. He is sometimes sensible and sometimes idiotic beyond belief. He was 16 in April, so not going on 17. WWYD?

OP posts:
Kingsclerelass · 10/07/2018 13:48

Only you can know that. Will he settle down with a pizza and play computer games or will he get his mates round for a party?

I probably wouldn’t, to be honest.

Justmuddlingalong · 10/07/2018 13:51

Are there other family members or neighbours who can check on him or be available in an emergency?

Original poster
Totopoly · 10/07/2018 13:53

Think it would be Domino’s pizza and rubbish on YouTube. He’s at boarding school a long way from home (broke up a week ago), and most of his friends are 200 miles away/on holiday, so not much chance of him inviting anyone round. It would be a no if there were any significant risk of that...

OP posts:
corrielover45 · 10/07/2018 13:54

This reply has been deleted

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Original poster
Totopoly · 10/07/2018 13:55

Just, no local family, unfortunately. His dad is away. He does know lots of adults locally (no immediate neighbours, but by no means in the middle of nowhere!)

OP posts:
Original poster
Totopoly · 10/07/2018 13:56

Corrie, that’s reassuring. I wouldn’t leave my 14 yo alone as she would have all her friends round like a shot!!

OP posts:
PenelopeFlintstone · 10/07/2018 13:56

Definitely would.

NorbertTheDragon · 10/07/2018 14:01

I left my oldest for a week at 16 as he didn't want to join us on holiday.

However I can't leave DS2 at all because of his additional needs.

So it all depends on the child.

ChanklyBore · 10/07/2018 14:02

I moved out at 16.

SummerGems · 10/07/2018 14:03

As he doesn’t have school in the morning I possibly would. What time will you be back?

Oopsmeagain · 10/07/2018 14:04

I had to leave DS1 overnight at 16 for a last minute family emergency. He loved it! Late notice so he didn’t have a party thankfully.

Frogletmamma · 10/07/2018 14:10

I went to Paris with a same age friend aged 16. Depends how mature he is.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 10/07/2018 14:10

If he's used to managing himself at boarding school I'd say he'll be fine.

Original poster
Totopoly · 10/07/2018 14:20

Thank you so much for your replies. DS also uses the boarding school argument - though he is of course very well supervised at school, however independent he feels. He has also reminded me, several times, that he is technically old enough to move out. It’s hard to know, as my parents didn’t leave my siblings or me on our own until after we had gone to university... DS can be very mature, and can also sometimes be more like a toddler Confused

Summer, I will be home at about 10 tomorrow morning (when DS would normally be still asleep).

Oops, I had also hoped the last minute element might reduce any possible chance of parties/friends round...

OP posts:
Original poster
Totopoly · 11/07/2018 18:47

Just an update for all you kind people who gave me advice yesterday. DS was fine. I left him food, drink, phone numbers (including of one of my best friends, who has known him since he was a baby, and who lives about quarter of a mile away - also primed her!) Also left money in a hidden place, just in case he rang me and needed some for an emergency.

Apart from the fact that he'd put the chain on the front door so I couldn't get in and had to climb through a window Grin (he was still asleep when I got home), all was well.

OP posts:
Justmuddlingalong · 11/07/2018 20:24

Glad all was well.

Original poster
Totopoly · 11/07/2018 21:33

Thank you, Just. Smile

OP posts:
Oopsmeagain · 12/07/2018 10:48

Great, glad it went to plan Smile

Parky04 · 12/07/2018 10:56

Yes and regularly do. He is a sensible 16 year old though.

MachineBee · 13/07/2018 17:43

I left mine when they were 15 and 17. They were fine. However I was really rotten as I left them a note with emergency info and contact details, that I signed off with ‘PS - I trust you’. Worst thing I could have done apparently Grin

Original poster
Totopoly · 13/07/2018 20:25

Grin @MachineBee

I would absolutely, definitely, over my dead body not leave my DC together. Blood would be drawn within the first 5 minutes.

OP posts:
MachineBee · 14/07/2018 08:21

Some parental knowledge and understanding of own DCs is the key here. My DDs were by no means perfect but my house was intact when I got back at least. Wink

happymummy12345 · 14/07/2018 08:22

I was home alone and looking after my disabled brother at that age, so I'd say yes

JustDanceAddict · 14/07/2018 08:27

Yes, if he’s ok with it.

GiveMePrivacy · 14/07/2018 08:28

He's old enough to get married. If you're genuinely unsure about leaving him home alone overnight, maybe think about ways of building up his independence now so that next time, you are more confident.