Could he be depressed or just his age

[ngibbons1]

My 15 year old son has been really moody over the past 3 months. He's quit football after playing since he was 6 and he just said he's fed up of it. He doesn't go out much during the week but goes out at the weekend with his friends. Today I mentioned his moods casually to him and he shocked me by saying everything's messed up. He basically said he feels sad alot and angry and doesn't understand why. I told him he could always speak to me and not to be embarrassed about anything he tells me. We hugged alot and he looked like he was gonna cry. I told him it was ok to cry but he said I can't and kept saying he was sorry. I've said we could go and see the doctor together and he said ok. Has anyone been through this or can give advise. I realise it could be done to yo his age but I hate the thought that he feels like this. Thank you x

I would say to take him to the doctor.
I have (still am) gone through this with my 14 yr dd, she was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety and is now receiving weekly counselling and medication which are slowly having a positive effect. It all started with her losing interest in activities she enjoyed previously, not wanting to meet with friends, not participating in family discussions, becoming extremelly shy and crying herself to sleep every night. After a lot of probing she eventually confided in me, tears in her eyes, saying she feels sad all the time but doesn't know why.
Good luck to your son, and keep up the good work you're doing by listening / talking to him and showing him you and him can deal with this difficult situation together.
After all, if it turns out he is not clinically depressed then a problem shared is a problem halved!

Thank you so much. I'm gonna make a doctors appointment for next week ( It takes a week at our surgery to get an appointment) . I hope your daughter is improving and feeling more positive x

The poor chap! Thank God he told you. First step his GP. Could you make enquiries about getting him back into football if he is up for it.

My DC's school have youth workers attached to the school. If yours has something similar please contact them.

You call also ring Children Mental Health Services. Your GP can give you advice and arrange a referral. The waiting list is long where I am.

Is there any chance he is being bullied or is taking drugs? If so reach out for support.

My DD went through this but her behaviour presented as very challenging. It was difficult to get her on board. I wish I knew then what I know now as she had a breakdown at 18. She is fine now but it was tough.

There is some good online advice. I don't know if they focus on children but MIND can signpost you. If he ever expresses thoughts of suicide take him to GP or if after hours go to A&E to see the mental health crisis team.

It might be worth asking him if he has been self harming and may be check his arms and legs when he is asleep.

It is really great that he told you. You must be a great mum. I hope I haven't worried you. With your support he will access the right support.

Best wishes to you

Thank you for your advise. I've asked about bullying but he insists he isn't. For some reason he stills liked going out with all his friends on Friday and Saturday ( and on the odd occasion during the week( when I ask why not during the week he says he just doesn't feel like it after school. He also doesn't seem to be showing any signs of taking drugs but I will now keep a close eye out for signs. I do think he's just struggling with the teenage feeling and emotions but will still seek help. I'm pleased you daughter is fine now x

Thank you Gibbon that's kind of you.

One thing I discovered back then was that DD had developed a sleeping disorder from being online so much and this resulted in low mood.

I wish I had seen the signs but her behaviour just looked like teenage angst. I was very wrong.

He does play online alot and can be up to the early hours at the weekend. I'd never thought of this. One other thing do you know when.we go.the doctors will I be asked to leave. I want what's best for him but would like to hear what he says so i can understand more and help him. Thanks for your reply it helps to have your advise x

I'd imagine you can go with him as he is still a child. My DD was on it every night for hours. I hope it goes well x

We are at the doctors tomorrow. Tonight he's confided in me that he's took something called xanex. He bought it off someone. Apparently it's an anti depressant. He said it made him feel better. He says sometimes he's not bothered if he doesn't wake up. I'm so scared.

Noooo to Xanax! That's not a good thing for him to be taking. He has confided in you, which is really good, and I hope the GP can offer some solutions.

Thanks. I'm pleased he's told me before it's gone any further. To he honest I dontbrealky know much about it apart from it's a tablet they have in the US

He's been referred to a mental health specialist the only problem is the waiting list. He told me the drug he took was the only way he could think of making him stop feeling like he did. He says now he's told me he knows he can get help other ways without taking a tablet.