Why are teenagers acting like adult and being allowed

[Nb65988]

My question is when is to young ok for sex in your house so there not outside can't we as parents say no to both?
When is the right age for a relationship? If we say no to young would they listen?
Why are teenagers over sexualised and us as parents need to accept it ? what ever happened to kids listening to parents?

I'm not for or against just like some opinions on it can we take back control,?

I suppose the best thing is to explain your reasoning to your children. Explain that relationships come with some heavy stuff that they may not be ready for - STD risk, pregnancy risk, etc. All possible even when using precautions. Also if they are underage, they are breaking the law. And so on.

Keeping the lines of communication open and having a good relationship with your kids is important. Also, explaining that you know how they feel and you felt that way too once. So it's not like you don't have feelings, it's just that you want them to thing of consequences before acting.

Of course, they may still not listen. That's always a risk. You can only do your best, I think.

I don't have children myself, but I do remember my childhood and the way my parents handled things. They were very dictatorial and you could not discuss anything with them. We were over-sheltered and had no life outside the home (except school). We learned nothing about life and all went off the rails come young adulthood. But that's another story!

*THINK, not thing!

I have always talked to mine in an age appropriate way.
I think it's important to keep reinforcing and talk to them when they tell you about friends who are in difficulties.
Encourage open communication between parent and child.
As they reach another stage in their life, and when new topics come into play discuss them sooner rather than later.
Socialise and educate them so they make the right decisions and you can praise them for this.
Talk about your boundaries and what is acceptable to you.
My parents used to have a saying that "You can do what you want when you have your own place"
I adopted this with mine, so they didn't ask for anything they new was not accepted.
E.g bf/gf can stay over from age 18 but have to have been together for a year.
I know mine had sex earlier, but it wasn't happening under my roof.

Yeah we have great communication and talk about everything she's very open but I don't want her in relationship just now she's just 14 I think it's just abit Young and it will lead to more thing she knows the hard facts as I drum them but I'm also telling her not to follow the crowd and if she doesn't want a baby not to have sex if i can get another year It would be great at 14 I would not be even thinking of sex if u did that u became a instant slut and no one wanted to be that not this generation they can't wait just so they can tell thete friends what happens when they split up are the going to sleep with every partner how .any partners will they have when there 16

At about 11 so Y7 I spoke to my dc about the difference between a relationship as a teen and then an adult.
As they got to 13 I stepped it up a bit, once they came home talking about who was seeing who.
They realised at this age it was friendship and anything else was not age appropriate.
Sex was for when you were much older and with someone you truly loved.
We spoke about love and the difference between hormones which were usual at this age and having sex which wasn't.
I have a 14 year old dd and she said she had a boyfriend a few days ago, they hold hands round school but aren't allowed outside school together on their own, so I'm not worried about opportunity.
I'm pretty sure if the opportunity arose though, neither would think of having sex as it isn't a normal thing at their age.
They do practise lots of music together and will take any opportunity for this. As their is CCTV in all practise rooms, I'm not worried.

I'm pretty sure if the opportunity arose though, neither would think of having sex as it isn't a normal thing at their age.

Oh you are so naïve! 14 year olds are hormones on a stick!

I have a 14 year old DD who is desparate to be grown up. She's in some ways very mature, and in other ways not. Which is what being a teenager is all about I guess.

But in terms of how much you allow - what I think I'm learning currently is that by banning things you don't necessarily stop them doing them, but you do close down the channels of communication with them on those topics. DD has always been very open with me but there are now some topics where she isn't and I think that's because she can't talk about things I've told her not to do. Not sure what the answer is though.