Self harming?

6 replies

Y78367 · 01/05/2018 15:39

Hi,
A few months ago I noticed some scratched lines on my 15 yr old Daughters wrist, when I questioned her about it she clammed up, said she scratched it at school and to stop fussing. I left it and hoped it would go away but a few days ago I noticed the scratches again and I emptied her bedroom bin today and there were tissues with blood on them - it looked like the tissue had been pressed on the cuts as the blood was in straight lines.
Has anyone experienced this? I don't want to get it wrong and react in the wrong way or say the wrong things. As far as I am aware all is fine with her - apart from the fact she really isn't enjoying school because of the hard work at the moment but she is a level headed, popular girls, never been in trouble etc.
Any advice would be really gratefully received :(

OP posts:

BalloonDinosaur · 01/05/2018 15:48

Hi OP, I can't give you any advice on how to deal as a parent, but as an ex-self harmer, IMO the best thing you can do is make sure your DD knows you love her care about her. And that she can talk to you about anything that's bothering her.

Try not to judge, even if the thought of it scares you, and bear in mind the severity of the injuries, be it cuts or just scratches doesn't necessarily correlate with how she's feeling.

She may seem fine outwardly, but be dealing/struggling with lots of things you're not aware of.

Good luck

JiltedJohnsJulie · 03/05/2018 19:08

It must be really frightening for you and I can’t offer any help. This book is supposed to be good though OP

bathshebaeverbusy · 06/05/2018 08:47

Self Harm help needed!
Just found out my DD(15) is cutting her arms. Anyone out there with experience as to what works to help her? ( and what doesn't)??
Thanks

user1472206348 · 06/05/2018 09:02

my step daughter self harms. best thing you cn do is be there for her. lots of love n openness , support her don't go nuts whenever she does it. just make sure the cuts r not to deep. sterilise the wound. in terms of outside support talking to school n gp is must. depending on her mh she might need to go to cahms but this will depend on the severity. try to limit access to objects, knifes, razors, pencil sharpeners, rulers. believe me they will use anything , they will also try to hide them. be warned is might get worse before it gets better. there r distraction techniques you could try if you look them up. but honestly best thing is keep her talking. its long journey we r still in it 3 years later n properly for lot longer yet.

bathshebaeverbusy · 06/05/2018 18:52

Thank you. She's on anti depressants and I making sure she keeps taking the tablets but I am so scared for her. there is so much conflicting advice out there and I so want her just to stop.

Onlyoldontheoutside · 07/05/2018 23:40

It is frightening as I've found.There is nothing much you can do apart from be there.Let her know that you know ,give her some plasters and don't condemn just tell her that you're there f she needs you.
Counciling may help.
It is endemic in schools,this doesn't help but you are not the only mother going through this.
My DD has mostly stopped but still does occasionally when stressed.There is no point hiding sharp things as it achieves nothing and you need your DD to trust you.
I have every sympathy with you,in my case it was the school that noticed and let me know,my DD was offered counciling at school and the school keep an eye on her
I'm lucky as myfd has found a teacher she trusts and talks to him if she is finding thing tough so we can help and support her before it all gets to bad.
Keep strong and Iwishyou and your DD a good outcome.

Flip