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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

How to get lazy kids to clean up their room

4 replies

Benandhollysmum · 01/05/2018 07:55

I’ve tried everything but still their room is disgusting. I’ve cleaned it up myself but next day back to a dump. My oldest daughter is high functioning so her thing is toast and rolling the crusts into little balls and everywhere on her floor. She’s nearly 18 and I’m getting sick and tired of it. If I tell her off she’s onto the phone to the camhs team or social workers to tell them I’m a bad parent. She even told the social worker she had no clothes, all her clothes were on the floor dirty I had to show him her room, was mortified by it, plus she throws some of her clothes out all the time so constantly replacing clothes. She doesn’t even wash her room stinks of body odour. I’ve told the camhs team this and they say I should stop shouting at her. My youngest though is messy does clean up but refuses to sleep in that bedroom anymore so sleeps on my couch.
Can’t go on like this anymore, really sometimes feel like hitting her. Sits up all night talking to people online sleeps all day constantly swears or tells me to f**k off. Just had enough

OP posts:
peachescariad · 01/05/2018 11:03

I feel your pain...I have an incredibly lazy 18.5 DS. His room is thick with dust and fluff...never uses his bin or his wardrobe (clothes on the floor all the time). I know every generation has moaned about teenagers, but all I ask is that as he's not renting a room, he lives here in my house and i find it disrespectful to me that he cares so little for his room or his possessions....he's lost countless pieces of clothes...electric toothbrush, RayBans and a prom shoe!...but he's not bothered.
I try to do 'keep his door closed..it's his room he can do what he wants..' tactic but I just want him to have some respect for his own corner and possessions...he's just come back from a weekend visiting Uni mates and bag left unpacked on floor...
IMO this generation really doesn't care....his attitude is 'I'll just buy another xxx'...this is def not how he was brought up in as we have always had a very tight budget and are not big earners.
Have you tried taking something away as a bartering tool? I take the PS4 controller away and after he's had a big rant about being treated like a little kid etc...he does make some effort to at least pick out his dirty laundry and put it in basket.
I live in hope that if he gets a serious GF then he might make more effort.
Until then it's back to taking a deep breath and trying not to let it stress me out and close his door.
You are so not a bad parent by the way! - you just care.

BackInTime · 01/05/2018 15:00

Sits up all night talking to people online sleeps all day constantly swears or tells me to fk off. Just had enough

Turn off the WiFi or change the password until things change. If you are paying for their phone contracts maybe re consider this.

Smeddum · 01/05/2018 15:02

I was about to say changing the WiFi code. Also, no sleeping on the sofa. It will damage it over time, and they have a perfectly good bedroom.

Nooblynoo · 02/05/2018 21:48

Don't do it for them. They can't be bothered to treat you or their property with respect so don't let yourself get wound up by their chaos.

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