Inappropriate pics for 13 yo

[beeswax2014]

I have access to my dd 13 phone and seen messages on her insta account from a boy also 13 from school. They 'dated' for a few months last year that ended in February. She cried for 24 hrs and then was ok. My dd is very shy and he has given her so much confidence.

I have met him and thought he was sweet. They went to the park and bowling on 'dates' and according to messages, have kissed and held hands, all fairly innocent.

But, these latest messages are about my dd sending pictures of her boobs to him!? She said she wasn't sure and said, maybe in her underwear!? I am SO shocked.

I immediately told her I could see her account (I know her phone pin code and she knows that I check periodically to keep her safe). I said that she should never feel presssured to send naked photos of herself. She clammed up and went bright red. I just said to imagine if photos of her got around the school and I was just trying to keep her safe.

I feel I went about this all wrong and have embarrassed her and made her not trust me. I also want to call the boys parents (met a few times) to ask if they know what is being said!? Hopefully they will back me up.

Has anyone had experience of this or have any advice please? This is my eldest, so all new to me in this digital age.

Thank you.

It’s illegal for anyone under 18 to ‘sextext’ - your daughter is 13 and the boy is 13 this is totally unacceptable behaviour on his part. I personally would raise it with the parents before he pounces on another poor girl.

This is worth a read: www.childline.org.uk/info-advice/bullying-abuse-safety/online-mobile-safety/sexting/

On his part what about her part she sent them and she's lucky they didn't go round the school the embarrassment of that 13 years of age and they want to send to send pictures like that it's just wrong and ure daughter at 13 should not feel pressure to do so this is why 13 year olds should not be in relationship by 14 they are having sex

Did she send anything in response? I don't think you have acted wrongly and she may be embarrassed now bit grateful in future. If she kicks off remind her how much worse it could be if her friends had got hold of pictures. Has the school done any pshce on internet safety and social media?

You must definitely tell her that it is illegal to send those sort of photos of a minor - even if it is the minor sending photos of themselves. I would also definitely tell the school and let them talk to the boy's parents.