Teen pregnancy

[Poppy1982]

I've just came home from work to my 17year old daughter and her best friend in floods of tears. Turns out her best friend is pregnant. She can't tell me when her last period was (she said ages ago) She has begged me not to tell her parents as she doesn't have a good relationship with them. Im really stuck with what to do! As a mother to a girl her age it would cripple me not knowing this. But I really don't want to break her trust as (these are her words not mine) she feels I'm more of a mum to her than her own. I really don't need negative comments as this is so hard for me. Im totally torn. Do I betray her trust by telling her parents. Or do I keep this life changing secret?

I'd just have a serious chat to her about how you feel and how you feel obligated to tell parents. Maybe offer to go with her and tell them together?

Please don't tell her parents, right now you and your dd are the only 2 people she trusts with this info and she needs you to be there for her she will have to tell her parents at some point and will need your support doing so, give her time and patience. A teenager thinks a month is ages ago she may not be too far along. Just give her time to get her head around it.

No, don’t tell her parents. She’s trusted you with this information.

Keep talking to her. Help her decide what to do and if she wants to keep it help her talk to her parents.

I would keep her trust. She is almost a legal adult and i imagine she needs time to adjust to this. What you could do is get her a pregnancy to be absolutely sure and help her book into see a GP. Might help with taking over options and helping her figure out what she wants to do.

I read something ages a go about coming out of the closet (gay) and that if you fear for your own safety if you tell you parents then don't come out whilst you are financial dependant on them etc. Give yourself some time and get secure etc, then if you feel comfortable come out if you wish. I would say an unexpected pregnancy is a little similar is fearing parents are going to hit the roof and perhaps make her homeless, or try to force an abortion or even force her to keep the baby etc . You need to deal with this very sensitively.

get her a pregnancy test to be sure*

Can you help her get an appointment at the EPU for a scan? She can't begin to work out what her options are until she knows how far gone she is. It may be easier for her to tell her parents once she has a clearer idea of what she wants to do next.