Checking phones

[littlebillie]

Does anyone check their children's mobile phones? I do and it helps me find out what's going on.

How old are your DC?

Does anyone check their children's mobile phones? I do and it helps me find out what's going on.

Give yourself a pat on the back

Bit of an odd post.

My mum used to check my phone/diaries: I still managed to conceal arguments/when I started my period/losing my virginity/being bullied/bulimia/pregnancy.

It will do you no favours OP, if they're young enough for phone checks, they're too young for a phone IMO.

Do they know you do this?
Because if they do (and they probably do, even if they're not letting on that they know), then you don't know whats going on. You know what they want you to think is going on. And there is likely a rather large difference.
Also - how old are they? Big difference between wanting to know the details of a 12 year old, vs 17 year old.

13 & 14 I thought this was advised behaviour checking internet history messaging etc

Cookie I'm asking what's the norm what's for the best? I have many better things to do

I check DS’s phone. He is 12. He knows I randomly check it.
I pay the bill, I get to make sure he is using it appropriately and responsibly.

I don't check. It's a difficult decision.

16yo DD often thanks me that I don't try to control or check her phone. She has friends who do lots of sneaky things b/c their parents are so rabid about checking the phones. DD has been blocked as a 'friend' a few times b/c some parent disapproved of her (typically swearing is part reason for the ban). The parents think they are responsible & doing a good job keeping their kids safe. The kids have lots of ways to sneak around communicating with my DD or others in ways the parents would think was unacceptable.

Twice I colluded in a lie with the kid of an always-checker to help the kid out of an ordinary teenage but awkward situation (they were too scared to take the truth to their own parent).

You tell me parenting strategy is best.

...*which!

Just got called into school and the were shocked i didn't check DD 13 phone the said its a must.

I feel its a breach of trust but school said they need to be monitored for their safety.