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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Reading Festival at 16...

62 replies

asneakysnickers · 23/01/2018 19:57

Hello
DS has just asked if he can go to Reading Festival.
He will be 16 and just free of GCSE's.
When he was young we went to lots of folk festivals (a bit quieter!) and we went to Reading together a few years ago.
He's a sensible chap and has an assortment of friends, both male and female, who don't know one another.
I'm not worried about him doing anything untoward, but I am worried about other people! Has anyones teen been recently who can allay my concerns?! Thank you

OP posts:

Glitterandunicorns · 23/01/2018 21:37

I've been to Reading festival almost every year since 2003 (I missed 2016 as I had a baby). There is no way I would let my son go there for the weekend at 16! There are drugs as far as the eye can see. It can get a bit scary on Sunday night and there are some campsites, particularly the ones closest to the stages, that I wouldn't be happy to camp in.

It's not necessarily that it's too rough; more that there are sooooo many people there who don't know their limits and take too much stuff or drink too much stuff and end up in a right state. I've lost count of the number of kids I've had to help because they've passed out or barely even know their own name.

If you can trust your child and his friends, then fair enough, but I wouldn't let my son go at that age without some sort of supervision (not an adult taking them around necessarily; just an adult camping close by so they know where they can go if they need help). I know it's totally sexist, but if I had a daughter, I definitely wouldn't let her go. I've seen some very predatory behaviour there over the years that makes me very uneasy.

Could you compromise and allow a day ticket?

Tollygunge · 23/01/2018 21:39

My sister went to Reading at 16. She told my mum it was to do with books. True story.

ArbitraryName · 23/01/2018 21:40

That does sound scary. Clearly it’s gone much more anti-social this century. When I went the atmosphere was not enormously different to glastonbury, but people wore more black.

yikesanotherbooboo · 23/01/2018 21:40

It's a post gcse rite of passage around here followed up by Newquay!
Leave them to it and worry all weekend...

superram · 23/01/2018 21:43

All the kids I teach go straight after getting their gcse results. My a level kids haven’t mentioned burning tents but I’ll ask them.

Original poster

asneakysnickers · 23/01/2018 21:45

We live in Reading which is partly why this was the festival in mind. Thinking back I went to Glastonbury in the 80's and there was fire started in an abandoned camper van. And my tent was almost eaten by a horse! Rather more tame than the Sunday Riots sound...

OP posts:

Ohforfoxsakereturns · 23/01/2018 21:47

Thanks for starting this thread and all the replies.

16 yo DE wants to go to Leeds and I am shitting myself. Been to Glastonbury a couple of times in my twenties but a very different experience for me at that age I imagine. I’d be happier if he were going to Bingley as a first festival.

Original poster

asneakysnickers · 23/01/2018 21:49

Thanks superram - I'd be interested to know...

OP posts:

supermodel · 23/01/2018 21:49

My dd went last year at 17 and it was fine, she didn't mention anything about Sunday night.

Tipsntoes · 23/01/2018 21:49

I've just had a similar request from DS1. I don't like it but OTOH he's old enough to marry or join the Army. I work with troubled teens and by 16yo, when they run away from home neither the police nor social services do anything (i.e. they're considered independent adults).

I'm going to be brave and say yes, on the basis that I can't keep him a child forever and nor should I. His friends are good people, he's not daft and I need to trust that he'll remove himself from any situation he's uncomfortable in.

Original poster

asneakysnickers · 23/01/2018 21:55

Good point Tipsntoes about marriage and the army! Makes a festival sound positively great!

OP posts:

Ohforfoxsakereturns · 23/01/2018 21:59

Same here Tipsntoes but makes me feel sick thinking about it.

AtiaoftheJulii · 23/01/2018 22:08

Asked ds - he camped in yellow zone, didn't see any tents on fire (I think they have been trying to stamp out that tradition!), and was in fact camped next to a fire tower. He said he didn't see anything scary/dangerous - said the worst thing he saw was their neighbours destroying their own gazebo and using the poles to have a sword fight

Original poster

asneakysnickers · 23/01/2018 22:10

Ha ha! That made me laugh AtiaoftheJulii!

OP posts:

ArbitraryName · 23/01/2018 22:30

My friends and I went to t in the park at about 16. The worst thing I saw was a very drunk young man streaking through the campsite treating the tent lines like hurdles. Later on he kind of limped back - apparently he’d run into a spiky bush somewhere or something.

Glitterandunicorns · 24/01/2018 08:21

@Ohforfoxsakereturns Leeds is supposed to have more of a reputation for getting a bit lairy than Reading. In saying that, I've never been, but my best friend has been twice and vowed never again as it was so bad. She said on the Sunday night she ended up having to stay awake all night because people were trying to burn other people's tents and belongings and it got a bit rioty. We live far closer to Leeds but still travel to Reading where it's less rough.

janinlondon · 24/01/2018 12:49

Reading these days is almost entirely populated by 16 year olds. Its a rite of passage. Let him go - all his friends will be going. Its positivelky normal.

Ontopofthesunset · 24/01/2018 18:19

Absolutely loads of 16 year olds go to Reading after their GCSEs. You can be like I was and just spend the whole weekend panicking and then make sure you shove them straight in the shower when they get back because they will be grey all over and stinking. There is lots of alcohol and drugs around, but the majority of them are not taking drugs, though most of them are probably having a few beers or whatever. The overwhelming majority of teenagers come back safe, tired, hoarse from singing and very happy if they have seen their favourite band.

Original poster

asneakysnickers · 24/01/2018 18:38

Thank you all so much! I think on balance as many of you have said, its a rite of passage and I think it will make him very happy (I'll just compose a list of things to reiterate first!)
Thanks again

OP posts:

Peartree17 · 01/02/2018 15:35

My son went last year, post-GCSEs, and ended up camping with about 30 of his school mates. They had a great time, slept very little, saw lots of bands and went to the silent discos. I didn't hear anything about Sunday riots or similar. The group knitted really well together, it deepened friendships, provided a shared experience and was a very good end to year 11/start of 6th form.

However - I'm pretty sure it was also a place where they were experimenting with weed, booze, ecstasy and sex. In fact, I know it was. No-one got hurt or came home damaged/pregnant/with an STD. If you don't want your child to (maybe, possibly) use the opportunity to experiment, or witness others doing so, don't let him/her go. But if you are aware of a method that can prevent teens from experimenting and pushing boundaries, whether at a festival or a party down the road, then for God's sake tell the rest of us!

BigSandyBalls2015 · 01/02/2018 15:42

Oh god, my 17 year old DD is also going this year. Makes me nervous but you do have to let them grow up. Could be worse I suppose, could be Magaluf!

JessyJames · 13/02/2018 11:55

The line up has been released this morning. I have a very, very happy boy, two of his favourites are playing!

CeeCeeMacFay · 13/02/2018 22:44

My ds16 is going to the Leeds festival for the weekend straight after he gets his gcse results. I will worry sick about him but I know I have to let him go, him and his mates are really sensible so just have to hope they are ok.

JDilla · 15/02/2018 00:30

Honestly Reading is the most family-friendly festival in the world, yes there will be people off they're faces on drugs but they'll be a lot of Mum's and Dad's with their kids there. It's a great laugh at 16 or 30 and as long as you've raised your kid right he won't be dumb.

yummymummytohelp · 04/03/2018 22:59

Hello, My DD asked if she could go last year as it was summer after her GCSEs. I said okay as long as she goes with a group of friends who I have met and there is an over 17 with them, x

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