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Teenagers

My 17 year old daughter

4 replies

Carl707 · 19/11/2017 12:00

Hi all, 2 weeks ago my 17 year old daughter was abandoned on my parents doorstep by her mother, following a split up with her mother 4 years previously, my daughter has touched on life with her mother and 6 siblings of which 4 are mine, my daughter appeared at the time to be healthy and emotionally strong, however, I have noticed she is extremely depressed, comfort eats what she can, I feel powerless, we have discussed getting her help with the GP initially with a view of getting her professional help from a councillor, I'll be setting up an appointment with the GP in the week, she is in college Tuesday to Friday.

While living with her mother my daughter got no love at all or emotional support, only what I would class as emotional abuse and from what my daughter has said physical abuse also, not sure on the extent of physical abuse,

She talks to me quite openly about her life at her mother's and how she's feeling, she also said that on 2 occasions during the last 6 months she attempted suicide with tablets, I want to help her as much as I can I hate seeing her upset and depressed.

What can I do to prevent her feeling worse?
Do you think it would be wise to get her to the GP even if it means having the appointment as early as Tuesday (which would meen a day off college)?

Any help would be greatfully appreciated,

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chequeplease · 19/11/2017 12:02

Definitely get her to the GP, they might suggest some counselling/CBT that could help.
Continue to be open with her and spend some good quality time with her, let her know you're available for her.
Is there any reason why she isn't living with you? Would that be better for her?

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Carl707 · 19/11/2017 12:26

Chequeplease, thank you for your quick response, bit more info, myself and her mum split up in november 2012, for the next 4 years my daughter stayed with her mum and her mother made it impossible for me to have any kind of access to see my children, my daughter is now living with me and has been for 2 and a half weeks now.

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Mummysailor · 19/11/2017 23:20

That's a good outcome. Please dont try to trade off though. Teenagers can try to trade between parents & the only way to get through this is to try to break down barriers with your ex. Try to speak to her & find out what went on. You may be surprised that all is not as it seems.

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firsttimemum97 · 19/11/2017 23:42

Hello, I'm 20 and have been in a similar situation to your daughter. I would definitely take her to the GP and try to get some counselling or therapy. I went to NSPCC for therapy and it helped me massively. I'm sure these stop seeing people at the age of 17 however there will be somewhere she can receive similar counselling. Although I still have bad days I can manage my feelings much better and have received a lot of help with my eating issues.
I think being supportive, patient and building a relationship where she feels she can trust telling you things without consequences (if possible) would be a good thing for you both to be able to do.
Whilst waiting for counselling I highly recommend taking her out as much as you can. If possible try and encourage her to spend less time alone by spending time with her but don't make her feel as though she's being watched constantly. Being distracted is one of the best ways to cope with emotions (for me especially) even if it is the smallest activity. Fi

I don't know your daughter, but I'd like to think that these things could help her get out of the dip in the road too. Things take time, especially with teenage girls 😊

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