Don't start on me

[HipsterAssassin]

I just reminded 14 year old dd it's time to go to school.

I have tried hard to step back, not be on her case with h'work, give her responsibilities at home, we spend time together etc but still it seems she is so flaming prickly.......

I know a lot of this eye roll-y sighing is normal but I picked her up on it. She has now left the house without saying goodbye.

Do I have to just roll with all this? Ride it all out over the next few years? I hate it!

She's feeling the way you might feel if you have PMS, try not to bite....lower your expectations for a while, eye rolling is mild! If you must mention it tell her how it makes you feel, without making a big deal about it - show her you have feelings too!

Eye rolling, like poster above said, is mild. But if you feel that she's getting increasingly disrespectful, you should call her out on it. I don't give my teen dds a pass just because their friends are worse. Intervene early. Once they get used to treating you disrespectfully, it'll be really really hard to pull back.

Thank you. Yes, eye rolling etc all par for the course, I let that go. It's just the vitriol with which she hisses at me sometimes. It's like she is a different child. I will speak to her about it.

Sounds like my DD Jekyll or Hyde...you never who gets up in the morning. It might get worse before it gets better.

I used to say to mine I don't remember speaking to you in that tone /like that seemed to make them think or at least reign it in, i found 14 to be the most tiresome they were so melodramatic it did me in pick your battles though.

I let a certain amount go when DD is tired, under pressure at school or having friend dramas. We all have bad days and I can be prickly myself sometimes However, there is a line and I think basic manners and respect are a must regardless of hormones.

Do I have to just roll with all this to a certain extent yes you do or the constant battles would be exhausting and achieve nothing... but I would say only roll with the minor shit eg. eye rolling, not the major shit eg being utterly disrespectful.

It gets said to death but there's a lot of truth in all the hormone stuff, it's a tough time for them and we have to bare the brunt of it and no mistake. Sooooo difficult to know the balance, just stay on here for good advice is all I can say.

I'm going through same with my 13 year old and difficult thing is not to take it personally. I find it so hard that the child who enjoyed spending time with you can't seem to stand sight of you! But as has been said I need to keep reminding myself it's not personal and just respond when she is being extremely cheeky and then point out how I feel etc. Every once in a while it gets through a little I think. They are just so pre-occupied with their own agenda that they can't think about how we are feeling!!!