Advice on allowance amounts

[goldiehawn1]

Hi all,

I am needing some advice around monetary allowances for a 17 year old boy.

His phone and food costs are covered and I tend to buy him advice things such as shoes, headphones, pants, socks, beer etc .

I want to stop doing this and just give him s monthly sum that he can budget with but I have no idea what would be a sensible and fair amount monthly.

Is anyone prepared to share what their arrangement is and if it works well?

Many thanks

Some of these amounts are very generous .

Like jimi I expect my 16 to get a part time job and he works in a local restaurant one or two sessions a week.

We pay his phone and he gets £30 a month (yes, a month) for everything else - he buys his own clothes, pays for his own socialising etc.

At Christmas/birthday I stock him up with underwear/toiletries but anything else he just understands he needs to buy himself. He manages very well and saves plenty.

I made DD work out what the cost of all toiletries - essentials, like shampoo, toothpaste, sanpro, etc - was and then divided that up into a monthly amount, added a bit for non-essentials, saving for people's birthday and Christmas presents, and that was the number.

When she's 17, we'll revise again to cover clothes/shoes and phone contract, but not now.

My dd is expected to keep her room tidy and do a few jobs around the house . For me it's about teaching her to budget rather than giving her money when she asks for it like a lot of my friends do . So she knows that when it's gone it's gone like with your wages . I will probably get her to get a job when she is old enough but her studies come first . I'll see nearer the time .

Whilst DD1 was at college she got £75 / month. We paid for travel card to get to/from college, and her clothes. She paid for food at college, phone, and discretionary spending. We paid all costs for her to learn to drive. We would have given her a clothes allowance but she didn't want to.

Now she has left college and is on an apprenticeship wage. We give her no money, but don't charge her rent. We have paid for a year's car insurance but she now pays for everything else. She will pay next year's car insurance. Holidays with us we would pay for, holidays with her BF she pays for.

To those saying make them get a job, its not always that easy.

DS, now 19, applied to a nationwide retail store at 17, seen on Indeed - first application, got the job - his friend who told him they were recruiting didnt!

DD now 17 has spent last few weeks applying for work. She has trawled Indeed, has handed CV into local pubs that were advertising, applied for some main shops for xmas staff, a local bakery that was expanding and recruiting. She has got no response from any of them. Just so much competition it seems, even for PT work.

She has just sent an application into local hotel, with one of DS friends that works there, but not holding much hope, despite it going straight to manager via this friend, as apparently they get a lot of people wanting jobs.

Its soul destroying for her. For now we've suggested concentrating on settling back into college and getting driving theory passed, as when she can drive there will be more scope to travel for work.

If anyone has any ideas of how she can get work, then please suggest them! I now realise that DS was so very very lucky - DD hasn't even got a response, never mind an interview.

Every time this question is asked you get an incredibly huge range of amounts.

At 17, my dc got £17 a month from us.
We bought 'necessary' stuff and paid for hobby/ subs but they funded phones, going out and 'unnecessary ' stuff.
Both mine got jobs. Both managed to save and learn to drive too.

It also depends what they've been used to having / doing.
Posters will say 'but that isnt enough for a cou9le of trips to the cinema' or 'a few coffees' etc., but we've not been used to going to the cinema regularly and don't 'go for a coffee' so there was no loss. If they have been used to having £100 spent on them, you are starting from a different place.

I pay mobile and basic stuff like toothpaste, underwear etc. At 16 she had to get a job to pay for clothes and anything else that doesn't fit my tight budget. She has a job in a shop and has learnt to budget, save, and not buy crap. Job done!!

Agree with BackforGod (not for the first time ) - and regarding paying for 'toiletries' it is remarkable how teenagers are suddenly happy to use the bog standard shampoo in the bathroom once they know they have to pay for their own, rather than demanding 'designer type' toiletries .

Pocket money has nothing to do with chores. We all keep the house clean and tidy because we all live in it and mess it up.

My almost 13 year old DS gets £3 a week. Do I win tightest mum award?
He has to empty the dishwasher, sort the recycling and walk the dogs in the morning.

I give him extra if he wants to go to youth club or something, and obviously buy all his clothes, toiletries etc.

You are all very generous!! My almost 18-year-old DD hasn't received 'pocket money' since she got a part time job a few weeks after finishing GCSEs, she now earns around £300 per month whilst full time at college, I pay for travel to and from college (around £1200 a year ) and essentials such as toiletries, college books and the odd bit of clothing. She saved up and bought a car and pays herself to insure and run it and also paid for all lessons, if she wants to go out with friends she pays. She doesn't help much around the house unless asked.

Wow a lot of you are so generous! When I was a teen (not that long ago!) I got £10 a month for doing chores around the house, didn't do didn't get. I got a job waitressing at 13 so I topped that up myself for luxuries days out with friends etc. All standard clothes etc were paid for, I had PAYG phone with a sim that had so many free messages minutes so topped up myself a £10 a month.

Not sure how I'll go with mine yet, depends on how much we can afford really probably not as generous as some of these! Luckily we still live where I was brought up near to a busy tourist town that's always looking for waitressing/shop staff so shouldn't have a problem should mine wish to top up theirs

DD is 15. She gets £60 a month. We pay her phone, buy all her toiletries and vast majority of her clothes, pay her bus fare and school lunches.

DS (14) refuses to do regular chores, so doesn't get anything! (although his Dad pays his phone bill). I was giving him a nominal £5 a month, but his Dad has now taken that as DS had run up a shocking bill wouldn't have happened if Dad had gone for a payg contract as I had suggested!

If he wants to go somewhere, then he (grudgingly!) negotiates chores in return for spending money.

I don't wish to derail the thread, but if anyone has any advice on how I could support DS more in budgeting and saving money, then please let me know! He refuses to apply for jobs as he says that he doesn't want to work .

My nearly 17 yo gets £50 a month. And her £5 a month phone contract.

She was on £20 a month, which then went up to £25 when she started college. It's now £50, but that's because I can't pay her school direct for her lunches any more.

I'm not paying anything higher. She knows that if she takes food for lunches from home then she has scope to save/spend the rest for herself, but if she's lazy or prefers to treat herself to food out (as food out would be a treat for me too) then she has that extra amount to use.

I hope she can manage to get herself a small part time job, but she's applied for loads at the moment, but not heard anything.

Although I'm clearly giving her too much as a new shop has opened in the area and there's high likelihood of actually being able to get a small (4 or 8 hour) part time job.

"I don't want a job" was the reply.

I was just wondering this morning how much ds will cost me in his teens. At present he is only 12 but is starting to socialise quite a lot and every time I give a tenner.

These teenagers really do cost.

Sixty a month but also pay her phone bill and bus fair to college!
She takes food to college but if she wants extras such as Starbucks she buys it from allowance.
Surprisingly she isn't as keen to waste money like she did when it was "mine"

She also works Saturdays too

We give our 14 and 12 year olds £5 each a week.
14 year old doesn’t like spending money (or us spending any on her) and does already buy many of her own clothes etc with her own money.
We have asked her to list all possible expenses for a year, e.g 1 coat, 2 pairs footwear, 4 trousers, 10 tops, 2 jumpers, going out with friends a couple of times a month etc etc with cost estimates. We can then negotiate a fair monthly amount so that she can manage this herself and we will just continue to sort out school stuff and phone contract.

12 year old is quite different, have just realised he has been spending about £4 a day on food at school since starting this term, so will start by setting a budget for that so that he learns that when it’s gone, it’s gone.

My son seems to think all his mates are given money for food every time they are out, in addition to pocket money. Can it really be true?

I give my 17 yo £50 a month. I pay for his phone (Sim only contract), clothes, travel to school and school lunches. So this is just spends. It's plenty.