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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

teen daughter + Friends want to go to under 18-s Lush party - advice/experiences?

15 replies

nowornever · 02/04/2007 15:49

\link{http://www.lushparty.co.uk/under18s/index}

anyone got any advice, experience, hints, tips etc for parents of a bunch of 14 year old girls going to one of these for the first time? URGENT - it's tomorrow night!

OP posts:
custy · 02/04/2007 15:56

i have a 14 yo. and i woulndt want to encourage club culture at such a young age.

along with club culture, comes club drugs and club drink and club clothes - short skirts dressing like a slut. never underestimate peer pressure.

i would say no

and i think 1 am is far too late for this kind of event.

i'm a firm no.

jofeb04 · 02/04/2007 16:28

Hiya
I haven't looked at the link yet, but I went to under 18's at clubs, and there were no problems (as I wasn't into the alcohol or drugs scene at that age).

But, my dad (or my friends parents) always picked me up, and no later than midnight (and that was at 16).

What are the other girls like, do you know them all? The group I went with knew my parents and vice versa, and my parents also knew their parents, just in case!!

jofeb04 · 02/04/2007 16:31

I've just looked at the link, and agree with Custy, 1am is pritty late for 14year olds (remember, at that sort of time, there will be other people outside). Also, how will they get home?

HoraceWimp · 02/04/2007 16:34

custy, you remember it well then? I was smoking dope and drinking at the under 18's discos......before going in and on coming out obv

Original poster
nowornever · 02/04/2007 17:21

I know all the girls and their parents and am comfortable with them, about 8 of them from the same school/year group plan to go together; will definitely drop off and pick up personally, and midnight curfew at the latest (they may manage 1am but I definitely won't!). Sadly the short skirts are a fact of life but I have already established I will have final say on clothing and will not allow anything slutty.

Any more advice anyone? Am discussing it with some of the other mums this evening.

OP posts:
Original poster
nowornever · 02/04/2007 17:21

Horacewimp, I AM ignoring you!

OP posts:
oxocube · 02/04/2007 17:43

I would say no I think - at 16 yes, but at only 14, an almost definite NO. Goes on far too late. The girls I know who are 13/14 go to school discos and stuff but they finish at 11.00 and parents always pick up. My kids are so going to hate me

HoraceWimp · 02/04/2007 17:52

haha at ignoring me

brimfull · 02/04/2007 17:53

My dd went last yr (she was nearly 15) It was her first time and wasn't a lush one but an organised under 18 night at a night club.I too was very reticent but the site was reassuringly hot on rules etc.Anyway she went and there was no trouble,she said she saw some kids being kicked out for smoking.Think it was a bit chavvy but she seemed to enjoy it.
There was plenty of security ,no one drinking,she drank the free water .She said they checked everyone for drugs and booze at the entrance,very strictly controlled for that sort of thing.

yesireallycan · 02/04/2007 18:02

Goodness I was drinking vodka and limes in real actual nightclubs at 16.

OrvilleRedenbacher · 02/04/2007 18:05

i thoguht it was maek up

wildwoman · 02/04/2007 18:09

I would prefer my daughters going to this kind of organised event rather than sneaking off and feeling they couldn't tell me where they were going. Give her a bit of responsibility and see how she handles it.

EllieKthePA · 02/04/2007 18:10

so long as you/another parent are dropping off and picking up i don't see why not. In our area the under 18's nights are very well organised, I tokk my cousin to one as a favour for my uncle, and made sure i watched her and her friends walk through the door so they were going where they were supposed to! (they didn't know i was still watching). my brother has been asked to leave one for smoking, they are all checked for alcohol/drugs/cigarettes on the way in and it's much safer than her meeting her friends and drinking in secret.

I do think 1am is too late tho, ours all finish at 11pm.

FrannyandZooey · 02/04/2007 18:17

God I went to a young teens club night when I was about 14 and it was just super tame

I mean you couldn't get a drink or anything, it was just young girls dancing round their handbags

in a way I think it can be a good thing, as they can learn the ropes of dealing with club type situations in a very safe environment, also that it is still fun to go out dancing even if there is no alcohol around

(if the event is slackly organised and there is drink being sneaked in I would not allow it myself)

rather than going to a real one for the first time when they are 16 and getting freaked out and ending up legless / whatever

Original poster
nowornever · 04/04/2007 16:55

well they went, and it was fine. Super-tame, mainly attended by 14 year old girls, well policed. Declared OK value for money for £5 by them. The real fun was getting ready beforehand and the sleepover/texting afterwards.

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