Teenagers and household chores

[cooey2]

What do your teenagers ( mine 14 and 16)
do around the house?
I seem to do the brunt of it while they live the life of luxury.

I have a 14yp (and 11yo).
He's taken over mowing the lawn this year (needs a few pushes), strips and remakes his bed when I tell him, will put the dishwasher on if he puts something in and it's full, will empty dishwasher - sometimes of own accord / sometimes when asked, vacuums own room and some communal areas when asked, makes his own food sometimes - mostly snacky lunch stuff, omelette, scrambled eggs, instant noodles, sandwiches etc, bakes sometimes - mainly flapjacks, usually clears the table after a meal.

11yo does all of the above except mowing lawn & putting dishwasher on.

I think.they have it easy!

Dishwasher, change own beds and bins.

Teenagers and household chores.

Two separate things, right?

I think I need to up my game- they only hoover the stairs , empty dishwasher and their own rooms!
Own rooms only get done after a week of nagging!
I need help in getting them on board to take responsibility .
Any ideas?

Mine are 14 - they don't have many non negotiable chores - table setting and dog feeding every day - one task each and tidying up after dinner.
They are responsible for making sure they have clean clothes to wear to school or casually, for cleaning their room - it doesn't always look clean! When asked they empty the dishwasher, make dinner, clean their bathroom, take the dog for a walk, mow the lawn, clean the car, hoovering - anything really! NO payment they are expected to pitch in and increasingly expected to offer instead of waiting to be asked!

Recycling bins.

Anything else only for cash when he needs it. We're not winning.

We have a washing up rota with everyone on it, so they take their turn on that.
Make beds, open blinds and bring down cups/laundry daily.
Put their own clean laundry away.
I'll pay them £2 to clean the kitchen floor or £5 to do the bathroom if I'm busy feeling lazy.
The 15-year-old does odd jobs for his grandma too (mostly grass cutting and gardening). She usually slips him a fiver for his trouble.

Oh yes, laundry when I venture into his room to look for missing towels. He respects himself with single use towels.

They clean own rooms - if they want to be messy fine, but no complaining. Same goes with clothes and rubbish from rooms - they are responsible for tidying up, emptying bins in rooms, putting laundry baskets out to be washed/if they want to wash it themselves that's fine.

Most of it comes down to respecting communal areas & if they leave their rooms messy then they deal with the consequences e.g. mess building up and then they end up having to do a big clean instead of maintenance etc. Started this at about age ~12 with DD1, but DS isn't as responsible and needs more nagging encouragement to keep on track. DD1 has MH issues so that's pretty much her limit at the moment but in the past has been responsible for sorting & folding washing, vacuuming carpet every week etc.

DD (14) and DS (18 but just finishing high school as we are in Oz). Both responsible for cleaning their own rooms and bathrooms though I will occasionally give the bathrooms a "proper clean". Change own bed sheets, DS is dyspraxic so DD helps him. DS responsible for bins/recycling and walking dogs daily (too strong for DD). DD is supposed to make sure dishwasher is loaded/unloaded and will usually give kitchen a quick wipe down if needed. Both set table/clean up after meals though I had to get onto them recently to make sure pots are not "left to soak". Both responsible for making sure garden is clear of dog poo but they definitely have to be reminded of that!!! I get laundry washed and dry, sorting it and giving everyone their clothes is up to them. They are expected to do extra as asked, it does tend to be divided on gender lines which I know is wrong and I try not to do it but the reality is if DS is asked to polish furniture he just won't do it properly (he's pretty good with the vacuum though), and it makes sense for DS to lug firewood upstairs as he is twice the size of DD. Writing it down they are actually pretty good.

I don't pay them to do chores as no-one pays me to do them in my own home and no-one will pay them when they have their own home.

My two boys are 14 and 11. They do the following

Unpack the dishwasher every day between them
Strip their beds, put it into washing machine and turn it on
Re-make their beds after washing
Set the table individually on set days
Clear the table - we all clear it but they put away place mats, wipe and dry the table.
Empty both recycling and kitchen bin (14 year old only, on 2 set days a week and puts the wheelie bin out) 11 year old puts new bin liner in the kitchen bin
Keep their rooms tidy, and remove their stuff from the lounge

Ds1 is learning to iron.

They will both be learning to clean their bathroom soon, but they already clean their skids out of the toilet. And they hoover a bit too.

Both children can make their own breakfast included scrambled eggs, both help to make lunches in the holidays and help make some dinners.

They know that if I get what I want, they get what they want, so they set a table, they get tech/mobile phone/x box. If they don't do it they wouldn't get it.

Start as you mean to go on. From 4 years old in school they collect their own dinner on a prisoner tray and then clear that away, scraping the tray out, putting cutlery away and their glass so why on earth I would I do it for them at home? I helped them scrape the plate but they carried it through.

Puts washing in the machine , brings crockery and cutlery out of her bedroom , walks dog

It's a struggle. Mine are meant to do their own rooms and other tasks as when asked. They will, without anymore nagging, empty and fill the dishwasher and hoover the stiars.

I did have a rant a few weeks ago about it not being my job to clean up the shit and piss of everyone in the house. Boys bathroom seems a bit better but DH needs taken in hand.

DS2s bedroom remains a state no matter what I do, i'm about to try charging him by the hour for me to do it and just deduct it from his pocket money. So, the messier it is, the longer it takes me and the more money he loses.

At that age I asked my DDs to do lots of different things. By 18 they went off to uni fully able to do all household chores. I would get them to dust the whole house, change their bedding and clean their rooms/bathrooms, fill/empty dishwasher and wash up stuff by hand. They emptied bins and piled the wheelie bin out. Set the table and clear the table. Cook dinner if needed. They were making their own breakfast and lunches way before then. I did the washing as I like doing that and I also did the hoovering as they hated the unwieldy vacuum cleaner. I really miss them now they don't stay at home now but I know they are out in the world equipped with good skills. I don't have any sons but is I did I would have done the same with them.

Aged 14, on and off since being 8or 9 has emptied the dishwasher, sorted out the recycling and emptied the bins.
Also will clean the cars occasionally.

I give him a tenner a week.
I won't argue or negotiate, I won't nag him, if he doesn't do it, he doesn't get paid.

Mine 21, 18 and 15 now, but much the same 5 yrs ago.....

Cook a meal each a week (at least)
Whoever isn't cooking needs to contribute something else around mealtime... lay table + get everyone a drink / unload dishwasher / clear up afterwards
Responsible for their own rooms - live in a pigsty or clean it selves, but I'm not doing it.
I obviously only wash what is in the basket, and obviously they put their own clothes away (and ds likes ironed things so he irons occasionally)
Do other odd tasks now and then as requested (not much, but things like make a cuppa, or clear away stuff off the draining board, or empty the washing machine / tumble drier.

After exams, if home all day, then I leave requests for other odd jobs when I'm out at work.