DD 13 - No Self Control

[Throgglesprocket]

My 13 yr old DD seemingly has no self control when it comes to rules - whether they be to do with food/technology whatever. She breaks a rule - no phone/tablet/laptop in her bedroom at night time constantly, so we are seemingly in a state of grounding her and extending grounding periods.
She lies to us for no reason, and has done since before she was a teenager, but it seems to be getting worse.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to ideas to either reward or punish her, as nothing either me, or DH do seem to have any effect - we're back at square one before we've even left it!

My daughter is going through a stage at school of being incredibly rude. I've cried today after another day in isolation for her, we spoke yesterday as she had detention. She has no self control either and I'm at my wits end with her. Her dad offers no help, isn't interested. Her school work is behind she is back almost a year when she went to secondary she was well above average. Watching for advice with frustration here too x

With the 'no technology in her room at night' because she doesn't seem to follow the rule start taking it off her at a certain time in the evening.
Start confiscating technology as a punishment too.

I always gave out chores with dd. .. Time spent brooding in a bedroom is unhealthy imo.
Gave her the chance to be around me if she had stuff on her mind - without the pressure of a proper 'talk'. And helping with the upkeep of her own home was a reality check that life didn't revolve round her solely. .
Got her to 28 with only 2 real fall outs. .

She doesn't spend much time brooding in her room - she'd much rather spend all her time playing Minecraft and watching Minecraft on YouTube at the same time. She had her laptop privileges taken away because we found her watching YouTube on her laptop in bed at 1am. She says she doesn't know why she does it, but she seems to just break rules without thinking - not necessarily because she means to break them, but because she really seems to forget that there will be consequences.

She should not be on a laptop in bed, it's a massive hazard! The bedding blocks the air vents then it overheats and will catch fire. At a desk or on a hard surface is fine but not on anything easily flammable.
It's best just to remove all technology at night if she 'subconciously' breaks the rules.