Unsupervised 16th birthday party

[lostinspace45]

My friend is having a 16th for her son at her house. She says she has been banned from being there so there will be no adult supervision. There will be lots of booze. She thinks I'm a bit of a stick in the mud about this but I'm so scared something will go horribly wrong. I've offered to be there but she says there are no adults allowed - what can I say to her (or should I keep my nose out?)

My DD2 went to a lot of parties like that at around age 15-17 and said they were carnage.She isn’t much of a a drinker and really didn’t enjoy them. She has refused to have any parties for her birthdays because of the ones she has been to as she said she would be too anxious about our home getting wrecked. DDD1 had one party at home at age 16 and made me hide all the spirits as she knew her friends would look for it and drink it. She also made us stay in the house upstairs for peace of mind. It is complete madness and very irresponsible to put lots of 16 year olds in a small space with alcohol and not supervise them.

Just remembering actually that my parents went away the weekend before my 18th birthday and left me alone. Have no idea why I seem to have forgotten this when talking about teen parties

My parents knew I was going to have a few friends round. I obviously ended up having a few more than they thought but it was all fine, lots of drunkenness, a tiny bit of damage which my friends helped me clear up/ sort out the next day and no real problems at all. Obviously a long time ago but not all parties go wrong.

I have fond memories of helping the birthday boy try to remove Pernod and black from the wall using Miltons at the end of a house party.

haha your friend will soon be sorry and learn her lesson when her house is wrecked and theres vomit everywhere, let her learn on her own. Give your son a reasonable time to be home or arrange to pick him up.

Trust me ! There will be every type of alcohol know to man !

I leave my ds17 on his own and go to my mums at a few weekends a year, for the last few years, they always recycle the glass ( bin usually full!) never much damage, 3 glasses broken to date, worst thing that's happened was someone rearranging the sylvanian family house! Dd10 was disgusted at the dolls in the shower and beds!

A few of my best friends when I was 15-19 had enormous country houses and slack parents (I was always so grateful I had a strict Ma when it came to house parties, didn't want my house being wrecked!) and the parties varied. Sometimes it would be fairly tame and the worst that would happen was one or two being sick through drinking too much and other times they'd get mega out of hand; think smashed windows, furniture and drunk teenagers in the pools, sick everywhere, shagging all over the shop. One even had a horse ridden through the dining room as a dare (had nothing to do with that...honest). There's no WAY I would let my future kids do it.
My brother had his 18th at home and my mum thought she'd play it safe, get a marquee in a field on the farm and keep everyone out of the house. Still carnage. There was a guy bottled, a guy with a broken nose, she had to drive a Land Rover at one brawl cause no-one could break it up and HUNDREDS of uninvited people showed up.

Just to report back that all went fine. No spirits snuck in, some brought beer and cider and we provided beer and soft drinks, several kids didn't drink alcohol at all. A few tipsy boys and one drunk one who was a bit argumentative at one stage. I handed him a glass of water and told him not to drink any more.

The other teens were all making sure he didn't drink any more as he was annoying them too. I just stayed in the next room for an hour or so until he'd calmed down.

One beer spillage, no damage and I can hear them using the hoover now to clear up

Your friend sounds very naive and immature, also there will be 15 year olds there.

My younger DS has had 3 house parties this year - the final one being his 17th in the summer. All with the agreement that we were here but upstairs and entry was strictly limited to the guest list - each time between 30-40 - which he policed superbly. I also did lots of food - and cooked pizzas at about 10pm and again at about midnight - this was a great excuse to be down in the kitchen now and then which seemed to be the hub of the party. I really enjoyed meeting his new sixth form friends - everyone was well behaved. I also made sure I didn't have a drink so that I could do a couple of runs home with a few girls who were threatening to walk home. I'm apparently a cool mum - I'd rather earn that accolade by being there than leaving potential chaos!