My Daughter (25) is behaving badly towards my son's (23) GF. I'd appreciate opinions as I can't work out whether to handle the situation carefully and be sympathetic, or to tell my daughter to stop acting like a rude, spoiled brat (which I am on the verge of doing).
The situation - briefly: My daughter has her own flat and is single - she works long hours and is stressed most of the time. The GF is easy-going, kind and bubbly, and the relationship with my son is settled: they have been living together for 2 years.
The problem is that my daughter resents my son's GF: she expects the GF to not be invited to family gatherings, meals out, etc. If they are all at our house, my daughter will ignore the GF, turn her back on her and when she does reply, is snappy. We're unable to go out together because she will not tolerate her company. She says she does not like the GF being so 'full on' but all she is doing is being polite and sociable. If she got over herself, the GF could be a good friend - if my daughter would only stop being such a cow.
I've aimed to bring both my children up to be thoughtful and kind, they've been treated fairly. My son is laid back and there's never been any major problems between them. We are a small family, though we have friends and the kids are used to socialising with all age groups.
I realise she may be jealous, I realise she might feel her single status more keenly seeing them together. I have listened to her explanation that she thinks it's 'odd' that the GF sits in the same room as the rest of us (!!!) but she is pushing my patience to the limit. To date I have ignored her rudeness when it happens, and explained that the GF is part of the family now: that her brother's choice is fine with me -as any BF of hers would be. Has anyone else dealt with this situation successfully?