Just come back from the weekend from hell, which was supposed to be so lovely. Booked a pretty luxo (for us, anyway) hotel in the country with various jaunts organised as a special treat for us both. What an expensive error that turned out to be. Daughter morphed from Jekyll into Hyde virtually overnight and I got huge physical stress reaction (involving stomach, most unpleasant) and only just held that and my tears in until I arrived home, then everything burst out. Daughter suffused with tears as well. I felt I should have concealed my misery as otherwise it's verging on the 'after all I've done for you' approach, but I just couldn't. Strikes me that any glimmer of success can only be achieved by the parent repeating self-nourishing mantras day in day out for 5 years. Single parenthood has a lot to recommend it, but at moments like this when one needs another adult's perspective, it stinks. Perspectives, please? This is miserable, and however much I repeat the theories to myself, I still can't help wondering whether I will ever, ever see my delightful, witty, funny, compassionate and adored daughter ever again And my stomach's still cramping!