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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Worried about DS (17) as he lied about a health-related letter he received today

13 replies

toucantoucan · 02/03/2016 17:10

I know I need to back off and accept that for medical matters he is treated as an adult, but can't help freaking out and imagining all sorts. DS (17) received letter this morning marked Private and Confidential. Was obviously a health related matter from the postmark and the fact that the start of his NHS showed through the window of the envelope. He got home from school and took it upstairs - I then in passing asked what it was and he told me it was from a university. Clearly not true due to the postmark (wrong town) - I said don't be daft, that's not the case and now he is very defensive. He admits it is health related but says there is nothing to worry about and that he doesn't want/need to tell me what it is. Of course, I am worried and imagining all sorts. He did say he doesn't have an STI - but added that the letter wasn't about that anyway and that it was just routine unsolicited information. Is this likely for a 17 year old? he hates injections so I am a bit concerned it may be about a vaccination and he isn't going to have it - his choice I know, but it would be helpful to discuss it with him. Anyone any idea what it might be about?

OP posts:

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 17:11

Could it be about the Meningitis vaccine?

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 17:13

This one?

www.nhs.uk/Conditions/vaccinations/Pages/men-acwy-vaccine.aspx

Original poster

toucantoucan · 02/03/2016 18:14

Against my better judgement have kept nagging - he now says he asked somebody about something health-related as he was concerned and he has been sent some information and is now not worried... He is however now rather cross with me....

OP posts:

Original poster

toucantoucan · 02/03/2016 18:16

But actually, I do think the meningitis vaccine is the most likely subject of the letter - right age, etc etc - and he really is so worried by vaccinations that it is the sort of thing he would refuse to tell me about.

OP posts:

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 18:16

Mmmm. It's hard isn't it, but there's not much you can do, but I would feel the same.
Ds1 is 16 and would probably not be happy with interrogation, but it's about his health and you are his parent and you worry.

I suppose if he goes off to University you will never know about any letters, ever.

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 18:17

And yes, it's still highly likely it's the letter about vaccination that he doesn't want to have and is just trying to fob you off.

Original poster

toucantoucan · 02/03/2016 18:20

Thanks Sparkling I am erring on the side of thinking you are right. And if it's not that, then I suppose I should be pleased he actually sought out information about something he was concerned about. And if there really is a cause for concern it will probably become apparent in due course!!

OP posts:

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 18:23

Do you know any other parents of his age group who you could ask without giving too much away about a possible vaccination letter?

Yes, but if he's actually worried and got some advice that's good too.

Travelledtheworld · 02/03/2016 19:21

I got a letter about Meningitis vaccination this week but my son is year 11 so it came from school. Possible that older students are getting them sent direct from their health authority. Students heading off to University are an at risk group and a priority for vaccination.

VimFuego101 · 02/03/2016 19:26

Well, on the plus side, if he's getting a letter about something, he obviously has the common sense to approach someone to find information rather than simply ignoring something concerning and hoping it'll go away.

Peebles1 · 02/03/2016 21:37

I think I would speak to him about how important it is to get the meningitis vaccine - regardless of what the letter is about. If it is about that, then at least you'll have tried to persuade him to get it. If it isn't about that, he'll be getting a letter soon enough about it anyway so it's still relevant. IYSWIM!

Leeds2 · 02/03/2016 23:15

Are 17 year olds all getting letters about a meningitis vaccination? Mine hasn't mentioned anything .........

I did have to do a double take a couple of weeks ago when the surgery rang about the results of a blood test. They would let me make an appointment for her to see the doctor, but wouldn't tell me why she had to have one and what the abnormal result was. Told me not to worry. Grrrr!!

Peebles1 · 04/03/2016 09:35

I had a feeling it was if they're going away to uni, so mixing and living in close quarters with lots of others and therefore at risk. But how would the GPs know who was going to uni?! So I'm probably completely wrong. DD hasn't had a letter either. Thought I'd just ask the GP at the end of summer, depending on what her plans are by then.

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