My teen DS 16 has decided to leave home. Don't really know why but he's quite immature in some ways and I think it's mostly because he has an 11pm curfew. TBH he's run a bit wild sometimes bevause I have three others and it's hard to be consistent all the time. He went to a posh school, usual story, sleepovers at posh boys houses, started smoking, did teen stuff. Is brilliant drummer and was in a band with DH (stepdad from 16weeks), plays guitar etc. Big temper but not really bad teen. My theory was he doesn't do drugs, he's usually home when he's meant to be and he hasn't brought any babies home.On a teen scale, that's not too bad. Had lots of problems with fruit machines over the last year, "lost" two phones and stole money from me three weeks ago. Was deeply shocked and hurt, took his laptop away and grounded him. Lasted for three weeks and TBH he didn't kick off like I thought. Asked to go out but didn't when I said no.
Sorry long rant! NOW he's working, that's a long story too. Basically cutting it short he now sells/promotes windows and is sort of on a basic plus commission. Last week was supposed to be home at 8.30 after work and turned up at 10.30! Had been phoning and texting but no answer. He came up with a mind blowing lie about breaking down in someone's car and after an hour of us probing we gave up. Both working, very tired. He admitted next day that he's been at some girl's house and fallen asleep. It's not the girl I mind, it's the worry and the lies.
Anyway, last night he announced quite calmly tht he was going to see a "room"! £54 a week all in, except food.Apparantly he's spoken to the people and is going to see it. If I had a teen phone me, I'd ask to see/speak to the parents first. It's in a shared Doctor's house with two other students and TBH sund OK. I've tried explaining that it's not that simple etc etc but can he sign a legal tenant agreement at 16? He is such a spoilt brat sometimes but he's my DS and I love him. Didn't sleep last night 'cos I'm feeling crap. His life here is easy and it's not like he's been running away and hates me. The final straw was on Wednesday when he phoned me from work to say that he'd been paid and wanted to buy presents for his siblings and me and Dad! Could he repay his "loan" over two weeks. Well, big lump in throat I agreed. I hadn't asked him to and it made me feel better. Two hours late, he turned up looking grey and in tears. He's gambled his whole wages away and came in asking for help. I didn't need to tell him off he looked so angry and sad with himself. Felt gutted and sick but booked him a doc's appt (which I can't know about because he's 16!) and came back from work to find he'd cancelled it. He's booked one for today but I'm not holding my breath. I feel so sad and everyone says to let him go and he'll appreciate home. BUT he can do what he wants, when he wants and he'll live on chips and junk. I can't legally stop him going, can I? His NF says I should just say no and mean it. WTF he's 6foot and not a baby. I don't want him to hate me but he's still only young, too young IMHO to be on his own. He met all his school mates yesterday who were allowed an hour out of school at lunch, and he wants to leave home!
Sorry long miserable rant, but help needed please.