DS is 14, recently been diagnosed with Executive Functioning Disorder (EFD) after years of CAMHs appointments. His brother as an ASD diagnosis and i suspect he may also be on the spectrum but CAMHs have been unable to diagnose this.
His behaviour is so immature and it is very hard to motivate him to do anything (all linked to his EFD I know) but this spills into school and creates a terrible tension for all of us. He is very bright but has gone from expected straight As to a mix of As in sciences but much poorer grades in anything that involves thinking or planning.
School have contacted us about poor behaviour - refusal to get down to work, slouched in seat, calling out and disruption. When we try to tackle him on anything his stock response is "I didn't do anything" and that all the teachers are liars. There never seems to be a moment when he can sit back with our support, reflect and at least admit that his behaviour is contributing to the trouble he has at school. At home he would spend all his time sleeping, watching TV or playing on his Wii U console if we let him. He has no motivation to do anything and no aspirations for himself.
He can be charming and engaged but it tends to be when others (usually relatives) that he likes are around. He has few if any friends and seems very happy that way and has now reached an age where it is hard to organise any sort of social life for him.
We are at our wits end with his verbally aggressive talk, his denial about his behaviour, and his desire to pick a battle with everything we ask him to do. Very occasionally the sweet child we knew when he was smaller (although he has always been demanding whether it has been behaviour, wanting to be on the go all the time, or refusal to sleep) emerges but it feels less and less and things just seem to be getting worse.
We love him and desperately want to help but it is proving very hard and I am feeling very down about it and finding it hard to stay positive.